The active members of the royal family seem to be pulling a lot of extra hours lately. Between Prince Andrew's ongoing problems and investigations and Harry and Meghan's stepping back, there's a lot to distract from. And truly, distraction is something the royal family is pretty good at, and Prince Charles and Camilla know this better than most.
One aspect of this distraction has actually been going on for years: the rebranding of Prince Charles and Camilla's relationship into an aspirational love story. And on one hand, you can understand it. Prince Charles was told that Camilla wasn't a suitable candidate for the role of royal wife, but that didn't mean he stopped loving her.
But on the other hand … it's really incredible that this has happened if you think back to the Charles-and-Diana years and all of the emotional and turbulent fallout that ensued. It's amazing that Charles and Camilla have been able to build a life together and to project that life as something we should all hope to have for ourselves.
Let's go back to where it all began: 1970 (or 1971). According to royal historian Robert Lacey (who is also an adviser on the hit Netflix series The Crown), Charles and Camilla are introduced by mutual friends. In her book, Prince Charles: The Passions and Paradoxes of an Improbable Life, historian Sally Bedell Smith writes, "Charles fell instantly in love, and Camilla, who had been dating Andrew Parker Bowles on and off for six years, was ready for some fun with the Prince of Wales." Scandal! Kind of.
The two are said to have been introduced at a polo match, and Camilla famously told Charles, "My great-grandmother was the mistress of your great-great-grandfather. I feel we have something in common."
With an intro like that, what else are you going to do? They started a relationship, but then Charles left to serve in the Royal Navy for a few months. By the time he came back, Camilla was engaged to Andrew Parker Bowles.
Andrew and Camilla made it official in July 1973, when they got married. This didn't mean Charles was out of her life, however. Andrew and Camilla had two kids, and they named Prince Charles as godfather to their son, Tom.
A friend of Camilla's is said to have commented that "landing a rich husband was the top of the agenda. Camilla wanted to have fun, but she also wanted to marry well because, in her mind, that would be the most fun of all."
Since Camilla was deemed unacceptable for Charles and then she went and got married to someone else, Prince Charles still had to find his own life partner. Enter Lady Diana Spencer, who first came onto the royal scene in 1977. Charles met her while he was dating her older sister, Jane, but apparently no one really minded this momentary familial snafu.
Following her engagement to Charles, Diana spoke about how they met: "It was 1977, Charles came to stay. He was a friend of my sister Sarah's. [He came] for a [hunting] shoot. We sort of met in a plowed field."
However, it seems like Camilla was never far from Charles' mind, or from his physical presence. In 2005, the Telegraph wrote, "Curiously, and with an ominousness that was to become clear only years later, Andrew and Camilla Parker Bowles were present at most of Charles and Diana's courtship venues — Sandringham, Balmoral, Windsor, at the homes of friends."
Despite this, Prince Charles plunged ahead and finally proposed to Diana in 1981. Royal fans were thrilled! Diana was a picture-perfect princess and queen-in-the-making. But even the engagement was tainted, as some reported that Charles proposed at Andrew and Camilla's home. Weird! But the story at the time was that Charles and Camilla were just good friends, so maybe it was OK … maybe.
Charles and Diana were married in a gorgeous wedding ceremony on July 29, 1981. The wedding followed an infamous interview in which Charles was asked if he and Diana were in love, and he replied, "Whatever 'in love' means." Ouch! He tried to make up for it in another interview by saying, "I feel positively delighted and frankly amazed that Di is prepared take me on."
And who knows? He probably really meant it.
Five years later, Prince Charles and Camilla resumed their love affair. Diana was known to be jealous of the relationship between the two, and she was onto the affair quite early. She finally decided to speak to Camilla about the affair in 1989. She recalled the moment in a later interview:
“‘I know what’s going on between you and Charles and I just want you to know that.’ She said to me: ‘You’ve got everything you ever wanted. You’ve got all the men in the world fall in love with you and you’ve got two beautiful children, what more do you want?’ So I said, ‘I want my husband.’ And I said, ‘I’m sorry I’m in the way … and it must be hell for both of you. But I do know what’s going on. Don’t treat me like an idiot.'”
The year 1992 was a watershed for everyone involved. This is the year Diana: Her True Story was released by Andrew Morton, and also when Diana gave a widely televised interview that detailed what was going on in her marriage.
The book caused a lot of drama for Charles and his family, and many were outright wondering whether or not Charles could still be king if he got divorced. It came as no surprise when it was announced that Charles and Diana had separated in December of the same year.
The separation must have cleared the way for Charles and Camilla to commence their affair in earnest. Camilla was still married when the explosive reports dubbed "Camillagate" came out. In the transcript of the infamous phone call the two shared, Charles is clearly head over heels for Camilla in a major way.
Surprisingly, Camilla and Andrew stayed married until 1995. The divorce of Prince Charles and Diana was officially finalized in 1996, and that meant that Charles and Camilla were in the clear … kind of. They were still under massive public scrutiny, and it would have been distasteful for them to throw themselves into a public relationship despite their new single status.
It seems that they were taking cautious steps toward coming out into the open, however, and Charles was planning a 50th birthday party for Camilla when the news that Princess Diana had died broke in 1997.
Charles waited until the following year to begin trying to bring Camilla into his life in a public way. Camilla was introduced to Prince William this year, but it seems the family held off on introducing her to Prince Harry for a while longer. There wouldn't be confirmation that all four had been properly introduced until reports that the foursome vacationed to Greece together in 1999.
However, the couple still had to get approval from Queen Elizabeth, and she really made them work for it. In 2003, Charles and Camilla moved into Clarence House together, which pretty much proved that Queen Elizabeth was at least accepting of their relationship. This also marks the time in which we started getting positive stories about Camilla's impact on Charles. Then, in 2005, the two got engaged. While Elizabeth wasn't at the wedding, she did attend the reception. The Queen and Prince Philip also shared their "warmest good wishes" for the twosome in their official statement.
While it remains true that Camilla won't become queen when Charles becomes king, she has taken on more senior roles in the family since their wedding. In 2016, she became one of the Queen's most important advisers when she joined the Privy Council alongside Prince William.
In 2019, Charles and Camilla celebrated their 14th wedding anniversary, which is definitely impressive. And they do have 35 years of romance and friendship preceding that.
Nearly every story about the two these days is about how Camilla has "transformed" Charles in some way. Where he was grouchy, she has made him happy. Where he was sad, she has made him joyous. And it's sweet, and it's also pretty amazing how if you wait long enough, any narrative can be changed.
In fact, last year a royal insider told Tatler that they've "seen a huge change in Charles over these past years. He used to be quite a morose character; he was very serious and didn’t laugh a lot. Camilla snapped him out of that and she has completely transformed him. He is a much happier man and has so much more confidence these days. It’s wonderful to see."
And that's definitely not something to take for granted, no matter how you get there.