The seeds of self-doubt are sewn in us at a young age. As a result, we start saying hurtful things to ourselves before we even understand the weight of those words. A heartbreaking moment of self-deprecation by a 4-year-old girl has gone viral, as have the words of reassurance she was told.
The little girl is named Ariyonna. She was getting her hair done by Shabria Redmond, an Atlanta-based hairdresser and rapper. Shabria captured the moment on an Instagram Live session. She was working on Ariyonna's hair when the little girl looked at her reflection and said, "I'm so ugly!"
Shabria stopped in her tracks to set the little girl straight. In an uplifting conversation, she explained to Ariyonna why it's important to think more highly of herself. Ariyonna began to cry when Shabria scooped her up in a hug. She reposted the moment later, adding a touching caption about the importance of teaching little black girls to love themselves.
Ariyonna is just 4 years old, but she already struggles with her self-esteem. Atlanta hairdresser and rapper Shabria Redmond went live on Instagram while doing the little girl's hair. Ariyonna looked at her reflection and exclaimed, "I'm so ugly!"
"Don’t say that! Don’t say that. Don’t say that. You are so pretty,” the hairdresser said to the little girl. "When you look at yourself, you’re supposed to say, I’m so pretty. You are so pretty, do you hear me? You’ve got the prettiest little dimples. You are too cute."
Ariyonna began to cry. Shabria hugged her and reassured her. "You’re gonna make me cry. You’re not ugly!" she said. "You are so pretty. You have this beautiful chocolate-y skin … you are beautiful, black is beautiful, and if nobody ever tell you, I will tell you, you are gorgeous."
Later, Shabria posted the moment on her regular profile with a message for others. "We Must UPLIFT Our Queens," she wrote in the caption.
"While doing her hair she had alllll the energy in the world then out of nowhere she stares at herself and gets soooo discouraged it broke my heart into pieces because she has the GREATEST energy and the most beautiful smile and heart!"
"She comes from a great home & loving mother," she continued. "I just think when kids go to school they learn and pick up sooo much different things that they don’t know the definition but they know the feeling ! Keep her in your prayers and keep lifting up our future !!!"
The video of the heartbreaking moment and the beautiful pep talk quickly went viral. A number of famous figures stepped up to make sure Ariyonna understands just how beautiful she is. Matthew A. Cherry, director of the Oscar-winning Hair Love, asked artists of Twitter to create works celebrating Ariyonna.
The moment reached Michelle Obama, who had a message of support for Ariyonna. "Ariyonna, you are gorgeous,” she shared on Instagram.
"In a world that sometimes tries to say otherwise, I want to tell you—and every other beautiful, intelligent, brave black girl—just how precious you are."
Jada Pinkett Smith reposted the video with her own thoughts. "THIS made me cry!" she wrote.
"Kudos to this beautiful woman for loving on this beautiful child! We gotta love on each other! This made my heart sing✨."
Viola Davis called on other black women to understand the importance of their legacy.
"THIS is the motivating factor for Black women to leave a legacy," she said, adding, "of WORTH of BEAUTY! We are fighting hundreds of years of brutal conditioning of being considered less than. It is sprinkled in our language, behavior, laws, music…etc.. and trickles down to our youth. I'm speaking LIFE into Ariyonna. From a sista who looks a lot like you….you were born worthy therefore you were born beautiful!❤❤."
Laverne Cox agreed with Viola and built on her thoughts: "bell hooks once wrote loving Blackness is a revolutionary act. Inspired by her words I have said loving transness is a revolutionary act."
"My trans politics are rooted in intersectional feminist politics taught to me by black women like bell hooks through her books," Laverne continued. "Teaching stunningly beautiful brown girls like this one to see her profound beauty and worth is our work. Let's get busy."
Days later, Shabria shared a video of Ariyonna in better spirits. In the video, she says, "I'm black and beautiful. Thank you everyone."
"Devil you won’t steal this baby joy ! Thank you to everyone who sent kind words to Ariyonna ," Shabria captioned the video, adding, "today she’s more confident and vibrant like any other day but just more of it ! God is def moving in this place ! Pray for your kids even if they’re not yours . Pray for em anyway !"
Ava DuVernay also sent her heart out to Ariyonna. "In tears over this," she tweeted.
"Somebody told this child this and her heart broke and her confidence broke and she believed it. Thank God for this beautiful spirit in her life to tell her differently. This video shows how deeply we harm each other. And fully we can lift each other up."
Since the video, Ariyonna has gotten her own Instagram account so fans can keep up with her. It's truly beautiful to see how the messages sent to her have changed her perception. It goes to show how much reassurance can mean to a person, especially a child.
The plus side to this is the many opportunities that have come Ariyonna's way since. She's been contacted by so many with uplifting messages, as well as the beautiful artwork made of her. Hopefully, she'll never again question how beautiful and special she is.
