The situation that Denise McCarty found herself in at the age of 3 is everyone's worst nightmare. Forty-four years ago, she was adopted by a family from the United States. Prior to, her name was Sang-ae. Back in 1976, she and her twin sister — who as an adult, she forgot she had — went missing after traveling to a grocery store in Seoul, Korea. They were both with their grandmother at the time.
Her twin was recovered just days later. But Denise wasn't. Instead, she was sent to an orphanage, where she'd later be adopted by a family from the United States. As she grew up, she knew very little about what happened, or who her biological family was.
But thanks to DNA testing, all of that has changed. According to People magazine, Denise signed up for a program especially made for Korean children who were adopted by parents from the United States. She initially gave her information in 2016, during a trip to South Korea.
Luckily, her biological mother also signed up for the program. The two were finally matched this year, meaning that Denise finally had the missing puzzle piece of who she is, and how she ended up in the United States.
The digital reunion was filmed for Korea Now, and it's quite touching. "We never abandoned you, Sang-ae," her biological mother said with a smile and tears. "I love you so much." Getting the full story from the source must have been such an unbelievable experience.
"I was told that I was abandoned, so I never knew that I had family," said Denise. She was then told that her biological family looked for her every day. They never gave up hope. On the call, Denise got to talk with her brother, her twin, and her mother, all who had tears in their eyes.
The family went so far as to open up their own business in the market where Denise went missing. They figured that if they were always located in the last place she was spotted, that maybe they'd run into her again. The love and dedication was so sweet, but it's also heartbreaking to know how much the family suffered for 44 years.
But one of the most rewarding moments was when Denise learned that she had a twin. Even though they were apart for so long and grew up in different countries, Denise said that so many of their mannerisms are still quite similar. "To then know that I had a twin sister who looked just like me!" she said in disbelief.
Unfortunately, there were two people whom Denise was never able to meet — her father and her grandmother. Both had died, but likely they would have been overjoyed to hear that Denise was finally "located" and was living a happy life. Denise admitted that she felt as if her father was there at the reunion in spirit.
"To have that missing piece of what happened to me is just incredibly overwhelming and happy and it makes me feel whole," said Denise. When travel bans are over and the world feels like a safer place, she's already planning on visiting her biological family. From there, she can learn even more about what happened and what she was like back at 3.
Also, for Denise's biological mother, she admits that her once-lost daughter is still registered as being hers in Korea — and she even brought the paperwork to show it. The amount of emotion she displayed was heartbreakingly beautiful. "My wish came true since I met you," she said.
It's just a shame that they can't meet up in person sooner. According to Denise, all she wants to do is give them a hug in person. She said she couldn't wait to "cook food, and eat food, and laugh" with them. Each time she meets them, she'll learn more and more about what those 44 years were like for them.
Right now, Denise is 46 and living in Springfield, Vermont. Chatting with WCAX, she admitted that she had trouble sleeping when she knew there was a match in DNA. "My heart was beating a hundred miles an hour," she said. "Like, I could not believe this was happening."
Denise's biological family also refused to move locations until they found out what happened with their daughter. It's upsetting to know that Denise was told a different story. She was told that she got too sick, and that was why she was abandoned. Knowing that all along someone was looking for you and loving you for 44 years is a lot to process.
Luckily, Denise knew how painful of a process it must have been. "I told my omma that I was sorry that I got lost and that she was worried about me," she said. "And that she didn't give up. And I wanted to thank her for that because it's been so long."
She also learned that her father took up drinking after she disappeared and ended up dying from complications involving alcohol. While it was his own method to cope, that must have been hard to hear. But like with everything else, Denise had no control over the situation. It's just unfortunate that it happened in the first place.
Overall, she's considering the reunion to be a big win. "I've just got this huge family now that loves me and that I love," Denise said. "You can't be happier than that. You can't ask for more than that." Aside from visiting Korea again, Denise is also hoping to plan a trip to Hawaii with her biological family.
Sometimes, someone's instincts are completely correct. And motherly instincts are often right on target. And that's why Denise's mom refused to give up. She had a feeling that her missing daughter was alive out there, and she did everything she could to find answers. After all this time, she's finally able to give up the search and truly get to know her daughter as an adult.
