For so many years, periods and menstruation were topics that a lot of people felt uncomfortable bringing up. To this day, even though they're linked to women's health, there's still a lot of fear. Ever stop and think about why? While inconvenient, it's a healthy bodily function. Those of us who are biologically women have to have a period every month. For some of us, it can be painful. For others, our entire mood changes. It's all natural, and it's nothing that anyone should be ashamed of.
That's something that actor Will Smith is still learning. Will is the proud father of son Jaden and daughter Willow. Willow is now 22 years old. When it came to lessons about her body, she was lucky enough to have mom Jada Pinkett Smith nearby to make the conversation both easier and more informative.
The conversation came up due to the backlash that rapper T.I. received after he admitted that he took his teenage daughter to the gynecologist to check her hymen and make sure she was still a virgin. Not only is this an incredible invasion of privacy and health, but it's also biologically incorrect. And the fact that a gynecologist would go through with the practice raises even more questions.
There's no way for a doctor to be able to tell when a young woman has lost her virginity. The hymen, which is a membrane located at opening of a woman's vagina, can tear for many reasons. Using tampons, having pelvic examinations, participating in gymnastics, and horseback riding are just four of the many activities that might cause a tear.
After the press was rightfully outraged over what T.I. had said, he tried to backtrack, stating that he was only joking. Appearing on Red Table Talk to set the record straight, he tried hard to formulate a response. "I think all of this surrounds a conversation that I was having in a very joking manner, when asked how do I deal with parenting in this day and age," he said, per CBS News.
The rapper went on to say that he only meant to state that he was very protective of his daughter. "From a place of truth, I began to embellish and exaggerate. I think that a lot of people kind of took it extremely literal," he continued.
At the very least, his "joke" got people talking. Jada used the opportunity to talk more about how she approaches the topic with Willow. In the Smith family, they have their own set of struggles. It seems like even Will has trouble embracing female health, making her more understanding of T.I.'s statement.
"There’s certain things about raising a man that I can’t know," Jada said. "I would tell [Will], ‘Love your daughter, let me teach her,’ because there’s certain sensitivities that you might not understand and have just because of your relationship in the world is different than a woman’s relationship." She's coming from the right place.
Raising boys and girls can be a completely different experience. It's not all about whether they wear blue or pink — it's about how society views them, and the sensitivities they may develop based on their own body image. Parenting is tough, but knowing how to approach certain topics confidently and without shame is very important.
Jada admitted that there are often jokes that Will makes that aren't appreciated, mostly surrounding PMS. “He’s one of those that likes to tell stories and sometimes goes too far," Jada said. “Willow has gone at her dad several times for very insensitive comments, whether it’s around menstruation or, you know, ‘You must be PMS-ing,’ and she’s like, ‘That right there, we not gon’ do that.'"
Jada is also aware that big changes might not happen overnight. “Every day, it’s a work in progress," she admitted. It's good to know that she has Willow's back, mostly to remind her that there's nothing to be ashamed of when it comes to women's health and sexuality.
Willow has made it a priority to correct her dad if need be. "Thank God he has me and he’s got Willow," Jada said. "We educate that joker before he leaves this house. You know what I mean?"
Hopefully, T.I. learned his lesson. It's one thing to be a caring dad. It's another to try and pry into your daughter's sexual health or turn an annual exam into something horrifying.
This just goes to show that a lot of fathers are out there getting it wrong. Jada's advice is incredibly important — you can love your daughter, but when it comes to health and sexuality? It might be better for a mother, or trusted female family friend, to take the lead.
Jada has always been excellent with sharing her motherhood tips. Back in 2018, she admitted that the only reason she could do The Matrix after just having a baby was due to her mother's own love and support. That's why Red Table Talk is so important.
If you never caught the show, Jada sits down with her mom, Adrienne Banfield Norris, and daughter Willow to discuss big topics — like sexuality. The three of them each represent a generation, meaning that the show is very insightful.
The show was also a hit with the public. All three women were nominated at the NAACP Image Awards for Outstanding Host in a Talk or News / Information (Series or Special) — Individual or Ensemble category, and they won. In 2018, they were also nominated for a People's Choice Award. It was a great show to tune into with your own family.
