A pregnancy is an exciting development in a person's life, especially one who has been trying to get pregnant and faced struggles. Good news travels fast, so couples are always looking for fun and creative ways to announce their pregnancies to the world.
Some of the most special people to tell about a pregnancy are the grandparents-to-be. One woman took to Reddit to share her experience telling her parents about her pregnancy. She explained that she'd been struggling to get pregnant, so she expected that her parents would be elated by the news.
The original poster also mentioned her sister, who also experienced fertility struggles and was still going through her own journey. OP's sister had been there for her despite her own challenges and was even there for her when telling her parents. OP couldn't help but realize that her parents didn't quite react as she would have liked it. When she confronted her parents, they told her that the happiness they felt for her was eclipsed by the sadness they felt for her sister.
"I recently found out I was pregnant. My husband and I have been trying for a while, and we were so excited to find out," she shared.
"We immediately decided on ways to surprise our parents and met with them the next week."
OP was also excited to share the news with her sister.
"My sister has suffered multiple miscarriages and she's honestly been my number one supporter when it comes to pregnancy," she explained.
"She's so excited for me and wanted to be part of the surprise."
Her parents didn't have the reaction she anticipated.
"Well, when I told my parents they acted more…shocked than happy," OP noted.
"Which was fine, I can't control the way people react. However, the next day when they called me….they told me that the first thing they thought of when I told them was that they 'feel so bad for your sister, imagine a younger sister getting pregnant before her' and then they went on a rant about how they hope great things for her."
Of course, OP was thinking of her sister's feelings, too.
OP had taken care to make sure she wasn't insensitive to her sister. She understood her parents' concerns but still felt hurt by them.
"They also proceeded to tell me they probably won't fall in love until I was past the first trimester, in case I lose it," OP noted.
"They made no mention of being happy for my husband and I."
OP told her parents she was hurt, only for things to get worse.
"I found this incredibly hurtful, all of it. I just wanted them to be happy for me. I hung up and thought about it, then called them back later to tell them I was really hurt by our phone call," OP continued.
"They told me I was being very selfish and self centered and that I needed to think about my sister's feelings, because that's what they are doing."
OP is willing to acknowledge she's in a sensitive place.
"Here's the thing: I have pregnancy brain and I get overly hurt by everything. I definitely admit I'm oversensitive right now," OP acknowledged.
"But I feel like they're making my pregnancy about my sister's tragedies."
She asked Reddit for what they made of the argument, and many people stood firmly on OP's side.
Some people in similar predicaments feared their own announcements would go uncelebrated.
"Congratulations on your pregnancy. I suffered a MC in June and am now 13 weeks pregnant, and I was afraid of telling people early on for this exact reason. I can't imagine how horrified I would be to hear someone imply I might lose my baby again, and dismiss my announcement based on that. This is disgusting behavior," one commenter wrote.
"Maybe have your sister give them a call? It sounds like they're assuming a lot of things about her emotional state right now, when in reality, she's actually cheering you on, unlike them."
Many thought OP's parents should have kept their concerns to themselves.
"They are making it about your sister. Some things parents are allowed to think but shouldn't say in the presence of their kids, sadly too many parents never learn that lesson," a commenter wrote.
"In their position I would also feel badly for your sister – but I'd never say so to you. Nor would I say anything so heartless about 'not falling in love until your past the first trimester.'
"I 100% understand how you feel. I'm 18 weeks and when I told me dad he literally said 'oh okay.' And then started talking about his business. It was so disheartening when all I wanted [was] some support."
These stories are based on posts found on Reddit. Reddit is a user-generated social news aggregation, web content rating, and discussion website where registered members submit content to the site and can up- or down-vote the content. The accuracy and authenticity of each story cannot be confirmed by our staff.
