A lot of people rely on family members for child care, so anything that disrupts that arrangement can be tough to bear. As one woman recently shared on Reddit, it can sometimes take something extreme to break off the relationship completely.
Unfortunately, the woman writes that she definitely experienced something extreme.
Her mother volunteered to watch the child during the day.
The woman writes, "For context my boyfriend (26m) and I (24f) both have jobs that have us work during day. We both have a daughter (5f) S. We live close to my mother so she offered to watch after S during the day."
She also has a new boyfriend.
"However about 2 months ago my mother started seeing this guy. We’ll call him Mark. I didn’t know him and so I told my mother that I didn’t feel comfortable with him being at her house while she is babysitting S. She told me that he wouldn’t be there during the day and that he works very often so they only get to see each other every so often."
But it sounds like Grandma might not be telling the truth.
"I believed her because she last my mother and we are very close. But the problem started when I was driving back to my house after picking up S. She says to me, 'Mommy I really have to pee can we stop somewhere?' I asked her, 'Why didn’t you go at grandmas we just left 5 minutes ago.' My daughter proceeds to tell me that my mother locks her up in my mothers room while mark comes over."
So she confronted her mom.
"At this point I’m confused and a little pissed off because Mark wasn’t supposed to be there in the first place. When I get home I talk to my boyfriend after S went to bed. He tells me that I should talk to my mother and I go to drop off S the next day. And I did that first thing I asked my mother was, 'Is Mark coming over while you’re watching S?' And she tells me, 'No, why are you asking' I tell her what sage told me, and she goes on to say that S is only 5 and she is making up stories for attention."
She finally confessed.
"I tell her that S isn’t a liar and she knows better than to make up stories like this. We go back and forth for a bit before I get her to fess up. My mother tells me that sometimes Mark comes over and when he does she locks S in her room so that they can have sex in the living room. I blow up on her saying, 'You’ve only known this guy for two months and you’re already having him over with my daughter here?! Not only could he have hurt you or her but you are locking her up in a bedroom so that you can have sex!'"
So now she's banned from babysitting.
"I tell her that she isn’t allowed to watch S anymore and she started getting angry saying that she wouldn’t have let anything happen to S and that she was allowed to do what she wants because it’s her house. I didn’t listen to her, took S and went home."
The grandmother hasn't seen the child in a week.
"We haven’t went back over there in a week. I’ve had my sister watch S but I need to either find a reliable babysitter or quit my job. Those aren’t big deals but S really misses my mother but I’m just not ready to let her watch sage. My boyfriend doesn’t want my mother to watch sage either but now I feel kind of bad. Did I overreact?"
People are commending the mom.
As one commenter wrote, "If anything you underacted, but are still in the 'good reaction' section.
"The fact that it's family you claim to have an otherwise good relationship with is the only reason I can see to not call the authorities. Personally I'd make that the last favor to family and cut ties."
They're really concerned that the child was locked up at all.
Another person wrote, "Locking a child in a room like this is abusive. She didn’t have access to a bathroom or an adult if she got hurt. I would never trust your mother with your daughter unsupervised again."
The boyfriend is concerning, too.
Ultimately, it seems most commenters agree with the mom completely. As one person put it, "Not only does grandma have terrible judgement, but so does Mark. If I found out my 'girlfriend' was locking a 5 year old away when I came over, I wouldn't come over. That's just creepy and wrong on so many levels."
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