When I gave birth, it was in a "baby-friendly hospital." At the time, I thought that it was ridiculous. Shouldn't all hospitals be baby-friendly? Then I realized that there's definitely a distinction. If a hospital is "baby friendly," it means that it promotes breastfeeding over formula.
Sure, breastfeeding is natural and it can be a beautiful experience. But it's also hard. Many women have problems with getting their child to latch, and some days it just hurts. Remember, these beautiful newborns will one day have teeth. Also, some women just can't naturally breastfeed. It can be an issue with their milk supply or just an issue with anxiety and stress, both of which are incredibly common for new mothers.
I wish that I had looked up funny and awkward breastfeeding stories earlier, since they would have made me feel less alone. I kept feeling paranoid that my daughter wasn't getting enough food the "natural way." Pumped milk and formula were easy to figure out, since you could actually see it in the bottle. But straight from the breast? Impossible.
Right now, we're all facing some trying times. But you've got to give some support to the pregnant women out there, especially if they're about to have their first baby. They might be doing this alone based on new restrictions. And not knowing how to breastfeed like a pro on day one may be the straw that breaks the camel's back.
For all of the breastfeeding moms out there, here are some funny and awkward breastfeeding stories to make you realize that this can be rough for many of us.
1. The Teacher
When you're breastfeeding, you often need to wear nipple pads when you go out. And since they can be a little annoying, sometimes you forget. That means you're susceptible to a lot of "leaking" issues. This teacher had one during the worst moment possible.
2. The Cops
One woman faced an incident where someone threatened to call the cops on her for feeding her child at a park. The strange part of this? She was wearing a cover, so nothing was exposed.
"I was only 18 years old when I had my first kid, and I looked so young I really only looked maybe 14 or 15," she wrote. "I can't tell you how many times people gave me dirty looks, had rude comments, stared … Someone wanted me to leave a park once because I was breastfeeding (with a cover) and there were kids around. I told them I wasn't leaving unless an officer asked me to. They called the cops but no one showed up and they walked away."
3. Mom-Shame
When you have a baby, your body does weird things that nobody seems to tell you about. They don't tell you about the month of bleeding, or how — even if you're at your pre-pregnancy weight — your favorite jeans just won't fit right anymore.
This woman felt it'd be OK to blame her mom after not knowing the ins and outs of breastfeeding. Luckily, her mom understood why the accusations started.
4. The Shamer
When it comes to breastfeeding in public, some of us are more open than others. This story from a Redditor is great, since the original poster — chelsearothschild — has a wonderful sense of humor.
"So we have a part time nanny who is super pro-breastfeeding, as long as the baby is an infant. She's told a few stories about cases of older children being breastfed in public with an obvious attitude that it's inappropriate. I don't share that view, but I've never revealed that to her," she wrote.
“Well a couple of days ago, she tells me this story: ‘My friend was shopping at Wal-Mart and saw this WOMAN, who had her babysitting in the shopping cart, the baby was old enough to be sitting up in the cart, and she was shopping WITH HER BOOB OUT just letting the baby nurse as she walked along pushing the cart! And this was no tiny boob either! Haha only at Wal-Mart!’ Well I think you know where this is heading. That lady with her boob out in Wal-Mart was ME! (We live in a small town, so I’m pretty sure.) Bahahahahaha. I laughed along with her, genuinely amused that someone saw me and repeated the scene to her.”
5. Crying Over Spilled Milk
Chrissy Teigen is always incredible. Her stories about her natural fertility struggles were important for so many women. And knowing she has also felt the pain of spilled milk before is incredibly relatable.
When you breastfeed, every ounce counts. Some people are able to produce a ton, and others produce very little. And the worst thing is, you don't know what your production level will be like until your baby arrives.
6. The Sports Bra Mishap
Pregistry user Bobbie posted a funny story online of a breastfeeding hack that happened to backfire. "When my baby was first born I was crazy busy all of the time (duh) and so I started poking holes in all of my sports bras so I could pump without holding it," she wrote. "One night my family had a dinner before Christmas. Everyone was there and while pumping I'd forgotten I was wearing the cups. I walked out in front of everyone in a Christmas sweater [and] pump cones. So embarrassing."
7. Self-Tanner
This one gets a pass. Because sometimes, after having a baby (and during pregnancy) your mind completely goes on overload and blanks. Gemma Colley, mom of a 7-month old boy at the time, got a spray tan for a wedding. And then promptly forgot. The photo is funny and the baby is safe, but it's a reminder that everyone makes mistakes. (For the record, she reports that a few baby wipes removed the tan pretty well.)
8. The Mouth Punch
This tweet from 2013 proves that moms have had breastfeeding accidents and fails for quite some time. Think of it this way — your body is suddenly doing something brand new, and it often performs that task without you being able to control it. It's hard for anyone to handle and happens to everyone. (At least you'll have a few funny stories for later, when you can really laugh over the troubles of early motherhood.)
9. The Easter Pump
It can be hard to explain breastfeeding and nursing to a younger child. While many families choose to be direct, others try to make it as easy as possible for their children to understand without getting too detailed with anatomy. This big brother had a hard time figuring out what was happening but still did everything he could to help his mom out.
10. The Nursing Top Snafu
Sometimes, it's not necessarily breastfeeding — it's the garments you wear that are supposed to make it "easier." While nursing tops are an absolute must (especially if you have a newborn), they can often be a little complicated. Practice is very important before bringing the baby home — otherwise, you might accidentally flash your relative.
These stories are based on posts found on Reddit. Reddit is a user-generated social news aggregation, web content rating, and discussion website where registered members submit content to the site and can up- or down-vote the content. The accuracy and authenticity of each story cannot be confirmed by our staff.
