Busy Philipps is totally an open book. But one thing she was nervous about opening up about was her child's gender identity.
Busy's oldest child, 13-year-old Birdie, who was recently cast in a nonbinary role in Amazon's upcoming series With Love, is queer and nonbinary. But while their mom was anxious about revealing their identity to the world, it was actually Birdie who pushed for it.
"Birdie had discussed it with me. They had come to me and were like, 'You can talk about me, my queerness and my pronouns on your podcast,'" Busy told Entertainment Tonight. "I was like, 'Well, are you sure? Let's discuss it.'"
But Birdie was adamant that it was important, even knowing that the response wouldn't be totally positive. So Busy went ahead and shared Birdie's story on her podcast, Busy Philipps Is Doing Her Best.
While Busy ended up being a little bit floored by some of the negativity she received, she says Birdie was OK.
"They're kind of always unfazed by everything, in terms of how people have responded," Busy said. "It was hard for me in terms of knowing that there would be people that would be unkind to my child. I felt like I was putting my kid out there, and putting them at risk of getting some of that negativity toward who they are as a person."
Busy definitely thought the world would be a little more gentle with her child, but Birdie seemed to have a good grasp on reality.
"Mom, you thought everybody was going to be real nice about it?" Birdie told Busy. "No, this is the world we live in … I'm so glad you did it because … I don't have to explain myself over and over again to people. You did me a favor."
While it's amazing that Birdie has such a mature outlook on the public response to their identity, it's still pretty disheartening to hear that so many people are angry. Busy revealed that the hate has been pretty nonstop. She said that since she made the reveal, she's gotten "so many horrible, horrible DMs."
Luckily, it doesn't bother Birdie, so Busy is trying to get onboard with her child's let-it-roll-off-your-back attitude.
"Who cares?" Busy said. "As Birdie says, what was I expecting?"
While there's a ton of negativity, for Busy, helping other people navigate the journey makes opening up worth it.
"I have gotten so many messages and letters in the last year of … moms just thanking me for talking about it, talking about my child's queerness and their choice of pronouns," she said. "Because they're also having the same thing, but they live in a small town in the middle of the country, and this helps them be able to have the conversation easier."
She's right that you have to take the good with the bad. Busy says that no matter what you're sharing, you really can't anticipate what the response will be, and she understands that. It's more important to her to "move through the world in a truthful way." How people feel about it is really up to them.
"That's their issue to work out," she said.
In the end, the past year has really helped Busy and her entire family grow so much, and she's incredibly thankful.
"I have great kids, a great family. I've got an amazing job, the best co-workers you can imagine," she said. "I get to do what I love. I don't really have a lot to complain about."
