No parent wants to imagine having a child who requires constant medical care due to a health condition, but for so many parents, it's an everyday reality. Dan Langlois and his wife, Sara, have an 8-year-old son who suffers from spina bifida. Because of the condition, Gabriel has had over 20 surgeries, resulting in a lot of time in the hospital. All but one of Gabriel's surgeries have taken place at the Children's Hospital of Wisconsin in Milwaukee.
As you can imagine, it's an extremely emotional situation to be a parent of a child who spends so much time in the hospital. You're trying to provide comfort to your child as you try to process the information you're being told and make decisions with a team of doctors.
Understandably, Dan has reflected on these feelings many times. One day, he decided to put pen to paper to write a letter to the Children's Hospital of Wisconsin. He later decided to send it. The hospital shared the extremely touching letter on Facebook.
This story first appeared on LittleThings in May 2018.
Dan and Sara Langlois have four children: Alicia, Hannah, Tyler, and Gabriel.
Gabriel suffers from spina bifida. He is a paraplegic and at risk for other medical issues as a result, such as kidney and bladder illnesses.
After feeling guilty the last time he left the hospital with his son, Dan decided to write a letter to the Children's Hospital of Wisconsin in Milwaukee, where Gabriel has been treated over the years.
The Children's Hospital staff were so touched that they shared the letter with their Facebook audience. "I have loved these doors and hated these doors," Dan wrote. "I loved these doors when my wife and I walked through them for the first time to meet our son. I hated these doors when I walked through them for his 20 surgeries."
He continued: "I loved them when walking back out after the surgeries. I hated them for the 180-plus-mile trip for a single 10-minute checkup. I loved these doors when walking out after learning that surgery or admittance is not required."
He then went on to explain the intention of his letter: "The other day, walking through them again with my son (I have lost count how many times over the past eight years we’ve made this trip), I was struck with a different feeling: guilt. I’m not sure where it came from, but I realized I need to apologize."
He went on to apologize to all those who feel the effects of walking in and out of those doors:
“To every parent that has walked in through these doors with their child, but left through these doors empty handed, I am sorry.
"For every child and parent that has walked out through these doors with a final diagnosis, knowing that walking back in through these doors would be futile, I am sorry."
“To every doctor, nurse, PA, NP, surgical tech and other members of the medical staff that have had to walk through these doors after giving everything they had to saving the life of a child and have that child pass anyway, I am sorry.”
“To every custodian, caregiver and advocate that has had to ready a room for the next patient after the previous occupant passed on, I am sorry.
"To every member of the security or social services teams that has had to escort grieving parents out through these doors, I am sorry."
He closed the letter by saying:
“I cannot begin to imagine what all these people go through, and I hope that I never will. Until I do, I will love these doors.”
There was an outpouring of stories from other parents. Some had stories of triumph, while others were healing from lost battles. Some still battle on, hoping for the best and agreeing with Dan's sentiments.
It was therapeutic for those who had been there and who find themselves there now to know they are not alone in their feelings. There was a ton of support for each person who shared their story.
Those who haven't been touched by illness this way were humbled by these stories and the perspective Dan provided.
Children's Hospital of Wisconsin was also thankful for the overwhelming response it got to Dan's letter. The staff were appreciative of the sense of community that comes together in the face of these battles.
Dan's letter was truly touching and reminds us all to be thankful, because our circumstances could always be worse.
