It seems like there's a new fad diet every other day. Some people swear by going low-carb, others think it's best to jack up your protein intake, and then there are those who swear by juice cleanses. And none of this is to mention all the celebrity weight-loss tips and tricks.
There truly are countless different approaches to losing weight. But we might have just found the most outlandish strategy of all time.
Allegedly published by Vogue sometime in the 1970s, this meal plan (which was recently resurrected on Twitter) claimed to help you shed 5 pounds in just three days — and you'll probably be drunk for all of that time.
Sounds fun, right? Well, not if you're the type to get hangry when you're not getting enough food. Scroll through to read about this bizarre diet and to see the hilarious reactions to it from around the internet.
There's nothing complicated about this plan — not even its bold claims.
Just so you have some context, losing 5 pounds in three days is beyond aggressive (and dangerous).
Even if someone could manage to do it on this plan, a lot of that weight lost is likely going to be water weight, especially considering what it is you're putting into your body…
Breakfast: the most important meal of the day. And according to 1970s Vogue, the most important meal of the day is… a single egg and a glass of wine, with coffee as necessary.
I'm sure you can already see why this is getting such a big reaction online.
But don't worry if you thought breakfast was too light — come lunchtime, you can double both your eggs and your wine! What a feast!
(And for those keeping track, that's now three glasses of wine by around noon.)
Because you're probably sick of eggs at this point, Vogue's diet subs in steak for dinner. Obviously, no one ever gets sick of drinking all day long, so you are permitted to polish off the rest of your daily bottle of wine.
And that's it. No more. Wine, eggs, steak, and coffee.
Needless to say, people reacted strongly to the tweet that resurrected this wild meal plan.
Many were slightly worried about the nutritional value (and the alcohol content!) of this diet.
One kind Twitter user took the time to break down the calorie, carb, and protein counts. Yes, it is low-carb, and yes, it is low-cal, but you're going to be drunk for three straight days! That's just not great for your body.
A lot of jokes are being cracked about what would… well, what would be coming out of your crack if you followed this scary diet.
The complete lack of fiber and high levels of coffee are a recipe for disaster in the bathroom.
Phrase it however you want: The result is going to be the same.
Just expect to be basically living in the bathroom in between your three itty-bitty meals.
Some are suggesting that this diet (or a version of it) really isn't as insane as it looks on the surface.
Substituting veggies for wine is a pretty major change, obviously. But by swapping wine for wilted spinach, this kind of works.
Don't think we're endorsing any of this — it's still utter madness. We're just pointing out that some people do go to similar lengths (and similar calorie deprivation) to shed pounds fast.
Predictably, the GIF reactions started to roll in right away.
Because even if you do lose weight, this is going to be your face as you struggle to walk in a straight line all day.
https://twitter.com/GraemePeacock/status/1037305460154671105
So. Much. Wine.
https://twitter.com/TylerRenner6/status/1037497765922664448
And you better keep that cooler near the toilet, because as everyone loves pointing out, this last gif is the likely gastrointestinal result of this diet.
https://twitter.com/podfish/status/1037549345497706497
Seriously, we don't recommend trying this at home. But revisiting this wacky crash diet was good for a laugh, if nothing else.
