Man Destroys His Girlfriend’s Heirloom Ring To Propose And Is Surprised When She Hates It

"My girlfriend (22f) and I (24m) have been together for about 3 years, and I decided around 5 months ago that I wanted to propose," he explained. "We share a dog and a home so it seemed the next logical step."

"She's hugely into jewellery, so I wanted to get her a really sentimental ring."

"At the end of September, her grandma suddenly passed away and as my girlfriend was the only granddaughter, she was passed down her wedding ring," he explained.

"Her and her grandma were extremely close, so I decided to ask her mom (her grandma was her dad's mom) if she thought it'd be a good idea for me to use one of the diamonds in the ring for my girlfriends engagement ring."

"She told me that as much as she loved the idea, she didn't know if my girlfriend would, and so told me to think about it."

"I couldn't find anything else I liked as much. My girlfriend didn't wear the ring as she was worried about losing it, so kept it in a box in a drawer, making it easy for me to take without her realising," OP shared.

"It ended up being a beautiful ring, and I thought she'd absolutely love the sentiment of it."

"Well, I proposed. She said yes immediately and was absolutely elated, until she saw the ring," he shared.

"She told me I'd practically vandalised and ruined the only meaningful thing of her grandmother's that she had and that I should have asked."

"I went to her mom for support, but she just kept saying she warned me that my girlfriend might not like the idea," he explained.

"She said yes to my proposal but refuses to wear the ring, which I just think is disrespectful considering how much money and thought went into it."

"How dense can you be… you destroyed a family heirloom and you seriously thought she'd love that?" one commenter wrote.

"YOU DESTROYED her one family heirloom! Because you were too lazy (or broke) to go buy a diamond yourself. That ring was a final gift from her grandmother. She doesnt have to wear it daily for it to be sentimental. AND her grandmother passed away just a few months ago."

"This was just … so close to be a lovely idea," another commenter wrote. "Like I can see where the idea was but it was ruined by OP not knowing his future wife enough to know whether or not she'd like it."

The commenter continued: "I think the biggest mistake was this was already her ring. He stole something out of her drawer, something she already didn't feel comfortable wearing, altered it, and gave it back to her. If this has been OP's grandmothers ring, if the grandmother had been alive to pass it down to him, maybe the reaction would have been different but the lack of emotional awareness from OP isn't good. Neither is the doubling down after realising how bad an idea it actually was."

"You can still absolutely recover from this, if you want to," the person explained. "Put in whatever effort is necessary to get the ring back and have the original stone reset into it. It'll look just like before, except polished and with new, stronger prongs.

"We are not defined by our mistakes, but by how we respond to them. It does concern me that you seem more focused on her reaction being 'disrespectful' than on examining why she's upset about your actions, but.. hopefully you've reconsidered that approach to this issue."