As a lot of us know, newborn babies can be quite the handful. Babies don't have a lot of ways to communicate, and crying is more often than not the best way for them to let someone know they need something.
A medical resident recently posted on Reddit that her neighbor just had a baby who cries seemingly nonstop. She's tried to be patient, but the baby is keeping her up, and it's impacting her performance at work — so she filed a complaint with her landlord.
Sleep is already a challenge.
"I (26f) live in an apartment," the woman began. "I’m a resident in a medical profession and I work 100 hour weeks plus a lot of additional hours of studying and paperwork. I hardly sleep as is. I cannot wear ear plugs because I need to be able to hear my phone when on call or if I’m called about a patient under my care. This happens frequently and I never turn off my phone and only update it when I’m at work. Just for an idea about how strongly I’m attached to my phone."
The baby was born last month.
"My downstairs neighbour had a baby last month," she continued. "Since she came home from the hospital I haven’t slept through the night. I’m woken up every 1-2hrs by the baby and this baby screams. I know the mom is trying her best- I’m sure she doesn’t want to be woken up either. But, I’m loosing it. I fell asleep Thursday standing up in the middle of rounds. My attending was not impressed and I was reprimanded. My boyfriend has been encouraging me to file a complaint because it’s not fair I can’t sleep."
She ended up speaking to the landlord.
"I have tried to talk directly to my neighbour yo ask if she could stop walking around her whole apartment (I’ve tried sleeping on my couch which is better but mom walks the baby around the apartment) or maybe if there could be some soundproofing done. But every time I’ve had the chance to go to her apartment she’s got a note about the baby sleeping and please don’t knock. I do not have her number or other way to contact her (I feel weird about leaving a note and want to address it in person). So I spoke to my landlord Friday evening. I was very clear that I’m not trying to blame this woman, I just wanted to know if there could be some sound proofing done or something. The landlord said they’d look into options."
The mom got really mad when she found out.
"Well, Saturday I had a day off mandated because I’m now considered a risk to patients which is causing a whole host of issues for me. I was sleeping and woke up to pounding and screaming. The mother was furious with me and kept screaming about how I’m selfish and trying to kick out a single mom, etc. neighbours were watching and I kept trying to explain but she (and the baby) just kept screaming. I lost it. I’m beyond exhausted and just screamed back. I told her her baby is so loud she might cost me my job and that I can’t function anymore because of her and that soundproofing isn’t the end of the world. If she can’t soundproof she should be considerate and [expletive] off from apartment living. She started crying and left."
She doesn't know what will happen next.
"I feel awful about it. I know I shouldn’t have yelled. I know that makes me TA. But am I TA for filing a complaint? My impression was the landlord was going to fix the issue not kick her out? I don’t want that."
People think no one is winning here.
As one person put it, "Having a baby cry to the extent that neighbours are unable to sleep and risk losing their jobs is a huge issue, and absolutely worth complaint. It's clearly not the baby's fault, or the mother's, but someone needs to do something to resolve that issue. If the mother is willing or able to install sound proofing, great. But if not, the landlord should. And the landlord can only do so if someone reports the issue to them, or 'complains'."
Sleep deprivation is also a major factor here.
Another person said, "I’ve worked 100hr weeks, and also been a solo parent to a newborn and can confirm that neither person is likely operating in their right mind. In both scenarios you are hitting a level of sleep deprivation that is approaching the legal definition of insanity."
Some think things could have gone differently.
Another commenter added, "Just pointing out that yes, the mom chose to have a baby AND OP [the original poster] chose to go into a profession that requires her to work 100+ hours and rarely sleep. There is no good reason one choice is superior to or should be more respected (noise-wise) than the other.
"I made the same choice earlier in my life (100+ hours) and wouldn’t again. Side note, baffling to me that we ALL allow this to be normal for our medical professionals. But it’s in no way the single mom’s fault.
"Liking all comments pointing out that OP hasn’t tried very hard to use headphones. There are a lot of ways to do this that don’t involve screaming at neighbors."
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