The New Year is pretty intimidating for a lot of people — that’s just the simple truth. I think that’s the case because most people have a completely irrational side that distorts otherwise joyous celebrations, like New Year's Eve and the resolutions that go along with it.
See, New Year’s Eve is out there, looming, for 364 days, all big and fresh and untainted, with this shimmery halo of potential hovering over it. Personally, I think that truly scares a lot of people.
It's as if people have this expectation that whatever they tried and failed to accomplish throughout the year, leading up to December 31, can be completely wiped away with an ironclad resolution. We assume that because our intentions for the new year are so genuine, all the promises we make will endure.
Wrong. The sad fact is, they almost never do. And that’s not me talking; that’s statistical data talking. Dan Diamond, a contributing writer with Forbes, says that out of the more than forty percent of people who actually make New Year’s resolutions, only a tiny sliver of them, roughly only eight percent, actually keep them. Ouch. That one hurt.
I wonder if anyone’s ever stopped to consider that the majority of New Year’s resolutions are made under the influence of copious amounts of champagne and other holiday-type spirits. If they’re not declared that way, then they’re probably made in some kind of food-induced state of consciousness. And we all know how authentic those types of promises can be. They’re just like the promises people make when they’re having sex. Like any of those are legit.
People have great intentions, I truly believe that. But we just put too much pressure on ourselves to pull it all together for the New Year. And that's because New Year's Eve has become symbolic as The Day to clean the slate. Unfortunately, that pressure gets everybody totally wound up and nervous, which is why so many people fall flat on their resolutions. Classic performance anxiety.
I honestly think that's what makes the New Year so nerve-racking is that it’s both the finish line and the starting line all wrapped into one climactic moment. It’s become the marker that so many people use when they decide to change everything. It’s like there’s this universal feeling that people have about it that gives it an almost magical quality. And it has come to mean that no matter how far we stray from being the perfect people we all desperately want to be, we always have New Year’s Eve as a guaranteed Mulligan that we can cash in on — like an automatic do-over.
The thing is, I think I’ve figured out why the success rate for New Year’s resolutions is so pitiful. I’m convinced it’s due entirely to the Eggs-In-One-Basket Theory, which the majority of people follow around this time of year.
When we put all of our eggs in one basket, like most people tend to do with resolutions, one of two things is bound to happen: The first is that the basket is impossible to lift because it’s filled with so many eggs. The other option is you ultimately get the basket briefly off the ground, but then you stumble under the weight of it, trip, and fall directly on top of the basket, squishing every last one of the eggs, which leaves you eggless and smelling absolutely foul.
Everyone, I think we need a new plan.
This year, I think we should try something completely radical and do absolutely nothing when the ball drops. Like, nothing. No planning, no resolving, no anticipating. Let’s all just be in the moment and try to enjoy it. No pressure, no expectations.
I think we should watch all the year-end retrospectives on TV and just enjoy them. After that, maybe we take a minute to think about what was good and right for us during the last year.
Then I think we should whip out some prosecco and make Giada De Laurentiis' pink grapefruit and thyme bellinis — they’re absolutely delicious and are guaranteed to put you in just the right kind of bubbly mood.
Then we watch the New Year come and go. Enjoy it for what it is and what it was. And then, when all the pressure is off, like on a Tuesday in early February around 4:30 in the afternoon, when no one’s looking, we can all sit down and decide what we want out of ourselves for the new year. That’s when we commit. Without any liquor or sugary carbs or stress to distort our thinking. We just pick a few manageable things that we’re confident we can work toward changing and then have at it.
No pressure, no fanfare. Just straight-up reasonable goals. That’s how we get it done. Oh yeah, and let's all remember that some kind of failure is always an option, because that’s life.
Baby steps, people. Baby steps.
For more from Lisa Sugarman visit LisaSugarman.com and Twitter.
