Twelve weeks into their pregnancy, Millie Smith and Lewis Cann's excitement devolved into dread.
These parents-to-be learned that one of their developing twins was suffering from anencephaly. Her brain wasn't growing normally. She likely wouldn't survive long after childbirth, and there was no available treatment.
Furthermore, in order for their other daughter to survive, Smith would need to see both girls to term.
So, Smith prepared all seven months to meet both her girls. Once they were born, she spent three glorious hours snuggling her precious Skye before she passed.
Later on, while keeping her surviving daughter, Callie, company in the NICU, another mother — managing newborn twins and completely unaware of Smith's situation — commented about how lucky Smith was to only have the one. That one comment shattered Smith into a devastating meltdown.
In that moment, she knew that she, Cann, Callie, and Skye had lived this experience for a reason. Now, she's fund-raising to launch a charity in Skye's name, aiming to help other bereaved families better weather similar storms.
Scroll through to learn more about this strong mother, and how purple butterfly stickers are giving other parents a better chance at braving the unimaginable.
[H/T: Babble]
Early on in their pregnancy, Millie Smith and her partner, Lewis Cann, learned they were expecting twins.
A few weeks later, though, the pair also learned that one of those twins, whom they'd already named Skye and Callie, was suffering from anencephaly. She likely wouldn't survive much beyond childbirth.
Smith told Babble, "We were both devastated.”
In order to ensure the survival of her healthier baby, Callie, Smith would need to bring both girls to term.
She explained: “Knowing I had to carry both babies full term then say goodbye shortly after was very tough. Dealing with it and preparing for it was hard. But the more we talked about it, the more ready we were.
"I spoke about Callie and Skye on a daily basis at work and ensured that no one felt awkward talking about my pregnancy.
"I got to enjoy my pregnancy and got to look forward to meeting them.”
The day of her emergency C-section, Smith readied herself for the mere minutes she'd likely get to bond with little Skye.
As she told Babble: "We were told from the beginning that Skye would survive minutes and would not move or make a noise. But the moment she was born, she cried.
"That was the most surreal moment of my life. She was crying and moving her arms and was just like a normal baby.
"It was thousands times better than I had expected.”
After Cann and Smith snuggled their precious Skye for three full hours, Smith said, “Lewis took Skye to see Callie (who was in the intensive care unit) and put them together in the incubator together just before she passed away.
"I wasn’t able to go as I’d had an emergency C-section and was bed-bound. This is the one moment I wish I had seen.”
After her daughter's passing, Smith remained in the hospital with little Callie, who was still recuperating in the NICU.
There, Smith endured the first post-Skye exchange that totally shattered her heart.
She told Babble: "None of the other parents knew what had happened or anything about Skye.
“The comment was completely innocent and more out of humor. A parent of twins turned to me, when their babies were crying, and said, 'You are so lucky you just have one.’ They weren’t to know that I did at one point have two.
"But the comment nearly broke me. I ran out [of] the room in tears and they had no idea why.
"I didn’t have the heart to tell them what had happened.
"A simple sticker would have avoided that entire situation.”
And so began Smith's quest, campaigning for other parents, unfortunately fated to suffer similar losses.
Stickers were her first step toward making anything about child loss more tolerable.
She adorned Callie's crib with a purple butterfly, to make other families and bustling nurse staffers aware that Smith and Cann were not just parents of a child in NICU, but they were also grieving the loss of second newborn.
As she told Babble: "Ultimately I will never be able to stop this from happening, but the more support groups we can set up and put things in place like the stickers, the better it will be.
"It’s the hardest thing anyone has to deal with.”
Smith hopes to raise enough money to promote wider usage of these stickers. She also hopes to develop a slew of other worthwhile, stage-by-stage bereavement resources, designed to both emotionally and financially aid new parents' journeys through child loss.
As Smith wrote on her Crowdfunding page: "After going through this myself, I feel there is a lot more that could be done to help parents cope with the loss.
"Support groups, counseling, even things like the planning of the funeral, additional daisy room (special room allowing you time with your baby away from the labor ward) and much much more. All these things cost money that no family should have to pay for.
"Our aim is to set up a charity in Skye's name to support Kingston Hospital with their work with bereaved families. The long-term goal is to set up a charity big enough to support families nationally."
She wrote: "When Skye passed, it felt like my world had ended, even though I had Callie, my heart was broken.
"I had had seven months to prepare for this and still the pain was unimaginable.
"At this moment, I decided I needed to help families in a similar position. If that's how I felt knowing it would happen, how do people cope when it's not expected?"
This strong mother is doing all she can to turn her horrible loss into a meaningful catalyst for change.
In the face of tragedy, this family is choosing to draw purpose from their experience, and gift other parents a clearer path toward coping with similar losses.
What do you think of this mother's campaign? Have you ever seen a purple butterfly sticker before? Let us know in the comments.
Would you like to contribute to Smith's cause? Visit her Crowdfunding page here.
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