A lot of families have complex ties and relationships. One woman shared on Reddit that her own family has a particularly dark past: Her mother cheated on her father and then moved on to marry the new man.
To make matters more complicated, the woman says that her mom also wasn't present in her life or in the life of her older sister. However, that changed when her older sister turned 18 and her mom started connecting with them. Now they get along pretty well.
"So my mom (29m) got divorced from my dad when I was 6 yo and my sister was 8 yo," the woman begins. "She didnt want anything to do with us, and she eventually got remarried to a guy who had a daughter 1 year younger than me. Our dad never remarried and it was later that we found out that she cheated on dad with the guy she married. But she got back in contact with us when my sister turned 18 and has been in contact with us since. And I have to admit she has been a good mother ever since, and we have a good relationship with our half sister also."
Then the woman opens up about her own financial situation (it's relevant, promise).
"Now before going any further, I must disclose that I was one of the founders of an app which was bought by a big private equity fund and I got a high 8 figures settlement as a result," she continues. "Also, I was a very early investor in Bitcoin, so from that also I earned massive profit. Suffice to say I am very well to do."
She paid for her sister's $80,000 wedding, and now her mom's other daughter wants one, too.
"So, my sister decided to get married earlier this year and I paid for the whole ceremony, it cost be around 80k in total," the woman explains. "No issues as I can afford it and my sister was very happy, which is what matters in the end. But now my step sister is getting married next month and she called me to say that I should help her with expenses in her wedding. I refused, why would I pay for her wedding?"
Her mom is pretty upset.
"But then my mom called me and said that I shouldnt discriminate between my two sisters, like wtf? I only have one. Mom says that since my step sister and her fiancee are not very well to do, I should help them. I told her that just because I paid for my own sister's wedding it doesnt mean that I would pay for the wedding of the daughter of the guy she left us for. But she said that I am being petty. My sister and dad are on my side."
Reddit is pretty united: The woman doesn't owe anyone anything.
As one commenter wrote: "Your money, your call as to who gets it. Also, your stepsister coming to you and actually asking for the money is seriously ballsy and tacky."
They're also suspicious of the mom.
Plenty of people also think the mom's timing is … off.
"So mom cheats, leaves dad, and pops up 10 years later (when the oldest is conveniently an adult)," another commenter said. "Doesn’t matter if she was a good mom ever since – methinks there is still resentment there, and the fact that mom and stepsis are demanding money for a wedding…well….
"Naw, OP [original poster]. Your money, not theirs. You have less than 0 obligation to pay for anyone’s wedding, regardless of relation."
They also don't think the sister should feel bad at all for not paying.
Another commenter wrote, "You paid for your sisters wedding using your own money. Your sister was and is a part of your life.
"Your step sister has nothing to do with you and her demanding that you 'help out' for her wedding is ridiculous. She’s not even remotely related to you. It’s your money to do what you want with.
"She’s 28 years old if her and her fiancé 'are not very well to do' then it doesn’t sound like they should be having an expensive wedding and them expecting someone else to pay for it is ridiculous."
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