Going to the gynecologist is a very important — yet very personal — aspect of many young women's lives. Even grown women likely don't want to have the news broadcast toward millions. However, rapper T.I. crossed this line pretty significantly. In an interview in 2019, the star made a comment stating that he accompanies his teen daughter, Deyjah, to her gynecologist appointments.
But not for mental or emotional support. T.I. clearly stated that he was at the gynecologist to make sure that Deyjah's hymen was still intact. A woman's hymen often breaks after having penetrative intercourse for the first time. But it can also break due to many normal activities throughout a young woman's life. Athletics, horseback riding, and even tampon usage can cause it to tear.
The comment alarmed many people. For one, it was an invasion of privacy. Two, a woman's sexual history is her own. T.I. treated the appointments much like a moment of shame. If Deyjah wasn't embarrassed by this before, she likely felt mortified the second her father made it public knowledge.
Now we know for sure. Deyjah spoke up for the first time about the awkward claims. And if you figured it would damage her relationship with her father, you would be right.
Deyjah opened up on an episode of T.I. & Tiny: Friends & Family Hustle. She admitted that she found out first from headlines, not her father — which had to sting even more. "Things are completely uncomfortable for me right now," she said during a clip of the show.
Since she's still living with her father, it's even tougher to move past. "I'm scrolling on Twitter and I see I've been tagged in a post," she said. "The only word I saw was 'gynecologist.' I didn’t even need to read the whole title 'cause I just knew. My heart sank."
The clip also showed her cousins asking her if she's OK, and she admits that she's been trying to balance her emotions on the topic for quite some time. "[I've been] trying to put it in the back of my mind so I'm not really thinking about it," she said. "I know it's not healthy. But I've been doing that since I was a child."
Having a famous parent may sound like you'd live a life of luxury, but sometimes it might make your relationship even more difficult. It's unclear as to whether or not T.I. knew that his comments would make headlines, but it's apparent that he didn't think of his daughter's feelings before saying it. Deyjah's health news shouldn't be T.I.'s news to share.
In the clip, she made it obvious that she's been repressing some feelings from way back in the day. "I tend to hope the issues just go away," she admitted. "I know it's not healthy, but I do it because it's easier." That, in itself, is heartbreaking. It makes you wonder if T.I. has any other controlling habits.
Deyjah also admits in the clip that her father always treats her differently for being a girl. "My dad even jokes with King about becoming a baby daddy," she said. "He would never joke like that with me." Then she admitted that having all of this come out in the open was traumatizing.
The comment, which first appeared on the podcast Ladies Like Us, was so disturbing that the episode was eventually taken down. T.I. casually admitted that Deyjah's annual trips were for him to ensure she was still a virgin. That, in itself, can be seen as a lack of trust and respect — and it also puts her gynecologist in a tough position.
A quick Google search would have told T.I. that these checks were faulty. It's also puzzling to figure out whether or not the gynecologist — who should know this — ever told him that it's not possible to actually check a woman's virginity. But the way T.I. discussed it implicates he has tagged along since his daughter was 14 or 15.
After the incident went viral, Deyjah did the only thing she could in the moment — she unfollowed her dad on social media. Fans noticed, with many realizing how terrible this invasion of privacy really was for her. Remember, Deyjah didn't ask to be in the spotlight — but her father did.
T.I. tried to publicly apologize to her later on an episode of Red Table Talk. But even his apology fell a little flat. "She understands my intentions and she knows who I am," he said. "She knows who I've always been. And I think that that allows a certain level of understanding."
But he did mention how talking about her visits could have brought on embarrassment. "The outside, the noise, it's distracting, it's confusing, it's hurtful and embarrassing," he added. His wife, Tameka "Tiny" Harris, also tried to share with the public that their relationship will recover from this.
"That is one of the biggest things our family had to deal with this season," she said. "It was a big deal. Their relationship is definitely much better now because Deyjah is a very bright girl. Her dad just wants to love on her, so anytime he's around her, he just can't stop loving on her. They've been doing really good."
T.I. and Tiny have been married since 2010, but they had a long relationship prior to. She even stood by his side while he did time in jail. Their marriage has had some rocky segments, but they've managed to stay strong. T.I. & Tiny: The Family Hustle debuted on VH1 back in 2011, and it's still a popular show.
Hopefully, T.I. learned from this incident. It may be hard to figure out your filter when you have a long-running reality show, but anything health-related should stay personal, unless the person involved says it's OK. As an adult now, Deyjah has a right to attend these appointments by herself.
