Gwyneth Paltrow has done a lot of interesting things in her life. One of those interesting things is how the actress approached her divorce with now ex-husband, Chris Martin. In part, that's because Gwynie did a really rare thing when she and her ex split. She popularized a new term: conscious uncoupling. It began a bit of a movement and changed the way people look at divorce when trying to raise kids.
Even the term "co-parenting" is somewhat new when talking about how exes continue raising their children separately. In many ways, you're still working together when you co-parent. And Gwyneth's outlook on how to go about it all was unique and refreshing, and it inspired a whole generation of people to be intentional about their family dynamic, even when divorce happens. Essentially, she put a more positive spin on parting ways while still maintaining healthy relationships for the entire family.
However, in a new interview, Gwyneth is opening up about her experiences with conscious uncoupling and being the person who popularized the term. She's revealing, for the first time, that it hasn't been as easy as she made it look.
Actress Gwyneth Paltrow has made a name for herself for so many different reasons — not just for her film career. She has an amazing wellness brand, Goop. She's a great mom, and she popularized the new term "conscious uncoupling."
Originally coined and created by relationship expert Katherine Woodward Thomas, the term really took off after Gwyneth mentioned it when announcing her divorce from Chris Martin, inspiring people to be really thoughtful and intentional about how they go about splitting their lives — especially when children are involved. By the looks of things, Gwyneth and Chris have done a pretty incredible job of keeping things amicable. But now Gwyneth is being upfront about what it was really like.
Gwyneth appeared on The Drew Barrymore Show this week. She and Drew talked about navigating divorce when you have kids, and the actress said that it's very hard! She spoke at length about the struggles that she has personally felt and how, at times, keeping things cordial for the kids has been immensely challenging.
"Some days it's not as good as it looks," she revealed. It's pretty refreshing to hear such honesty from the Goop queen! People have really looked to Gwyneth as a divorce guru. Knowing that she struggles to get along with her ex like the rest of us from time to time is just downright nice to hear.
"You have to have radical accountability," she said. "You have to know that every relationship is 50/50. No matter what you think, how you think you were wronged, or how bad you perceive the other person's actions, or whatever the case may be."
It's definitely great advice. Going through a divorce pushes you to be your best self — even when you feel like you're at your worst. At the end of the day, when kids are involved, you still have to show up and be kind. That is definitely not always easy.
Still, Gwyneth and Chris are committed to having a healthy relationship, and that's the most important part. "If you are brave enough to take responsibility for your half and really look at your own garbage and your own trauma and how it's presenting in the world and in your relationship then there really is somewhere to go and something to learn and something to heal," she said.
Gwyneth has become somewhat of a controversial character in recent years. People assume she's got it all and as a result is sort of out of touch. Hearing her open up about her struggles with co-parenting is huge, and it really helps us to understand that she's just human.
"I really wanted my kids to not be traumatized, if it were possible," she continued. "Chris and I committed to putting them first and that's harder than it looks, because some days you really don't want to be with the person that you are getting divorced from. But if you're committed to having family dinner then you do it."
So many people struggle to maintain amicable relationships after a divorce. Knowing that even Gwyneth Paltrow — the person who popularized conscious uncoupling — also struggled, and still does, is somehow oddly liberating.
We're really loving this new upfront Gwyneth we seem to be seeing more of.
