Having a baby is quite a joy. Yes, they interrupt your schedule. Sure, that first month of adjustment can be really hard. But new parents often look at their tiny bundle of joy and think to themselves, "I created that?"
The human body is incredible, and childbirth proves it. While it's a natural phenomenon, it's still amazing to undergo personally. Meeting your child whom you've only known through kicks and rolls is an experience like no other in the world. When you give birth, you understand that love at first sight is real.
However, having a baby can also be heartbreaking. Here are the many emotions and revelations you experience as your baby starts to grow up.
1. Babies, unfortunately, don't come with a rewind button.
As adults, you're more or less fully grown. Sure, there are still life stages and appearance changes that'll take place, but you've established a life for yourself. Children change very rapidly. Before you know it, your newborn will be a 3-year-old who is having full conversations with you.
Every stage of childhood is beautiful in its own way. But so often, you'll find yourself looking at your child and flashing back to the moment you gave birth. It'll make you really realize the power of time and how quickly things have changed. And you might miss the baby snuggles and the times your baby was completely dependent on you. It goes by in the blink of an eye.
2. It's tough to come to terms with the fact that they need you less.
It's good to have some personal freedom back, but you'll also deal with mixed emotions when you stop breastfeeding (or providing formula) and when your baby finally masters bedtime. It's a little hard to explain, but it's especially sad if you're on your last child or know you're having only one. Those are life experiences that you'll never get back, and — while wearing nursing pads is something nobody loves in the moment — you'll miss them when they're gone for good.
3. There are always milestones, but the baby years contain the important ones.
Nobody will ask you about your child's first sentence. They will, however, ask about their first word. When your baby starts to walk and talk, it's a magical moment that is hard to duplicate. Those are signs that your baby is growing up, and those signs will stick with you forever.
And those milestones happen pretty fast. Many babies start both around a year of age, with some hitting them even earlier.
4. Their little personalities will grow.
When your children are babies, you'll probably imagine what their lives will be like. But when their personalities start to shine, you'll also remind yourself that they're not an extension of you — they're their own individual. It's important to make sure that your baby gets to explore their own interests. But it's also slightly terrifying. Because it also means that your daily life is going to change as well.
If your kid loves swimming, that means that your future may contain swim meets and competitions. If they're musically inclined, it may indicate that your home may someday house a garage band, even if live music isn't your thing. It's uplifting to see who they really are, but it can also be an adjustment for parents.
5. There are so many moments where you want to help them, but can't.
Like, when they're teething. They're going through something natural, but they don't quite understand what. As a parent, all you want to do is take away the pain. But sometimes, it's impossible.
The same goes for doctor appointments. Are vaccinations important and lifesaving? Of course. And having your baby get vaccinated will ease so many worries. But seeing your baby get a shot and not being able to prepare them will break your heart every time.
6. There will be times when your baby will prefer the other parent.
It's wonderful since all familial bonds are lovely to see. But it can also be heartbreaking, especially if you start feeling unnecessary. Just remember, your baby loves you. You will always be their parent, and their rock.
Many babies have "phases," and What To Expect states this is very common. A lot of it has to do with independence and being able to choose. "Playing favorites is common with toddlers (for example, that toddler attachment to a lovey) and has nothing to do with one of you being the better parent or being loved more," the site says. "In fact, pretty soon you may find that the tide has turned: Toddlers once fiercely glued to Mommy may be suddenly stuck on Daddy — or vice versa."
7. It's so tough to leave them.
Personally, my daughter is 4 and I've spent only one night away from her after an unexpected hospital trip — and at the time, she was 3. That night was really difficult. I knew she'd be OK, but separation is harder than anyone can imagine. Despite having her father there as well as her grandmother for backup, I still had a sinking feeling inside. What if she missed me? What if she was scared? What if this hospital stay extended even longer?
If you're equally as attached to your baby, you may find it hard to leave them. It's wonderful feeling so close to someone that you can't bare to be apart. But when you need to, it's oddly devastating.
