Husband Tells Wife To ‘Get Over’ Herself And Start Wearing Makeup Because It Bothers Him

There are plenty of reasons why makeup at a wedding is a great idea, but his wife completely refused. "Both of our mothers tried to convince her, but she said she's never worn makeup and she wasn't going to start on a day that she was supposed to enjoy," he noted. It makes sense and is a noble stance to take, but as he realized, it affected his own memories of the day a little bit.

"They tried to tell her the pictures wouldn't come out as good, and honestly they were kind of right – she’s got huge bags under her eyes and I think the photos would've been nicer if she’d just put on concealer or something," he said. Again, it was her choice — but it was a choice that didn't lead to any severe consequences. However, recently her decisions have started to affect his family.

"We were at a family dinner last night with my parents, sister and her husband, and my niece and nephew," he wrote. "My niece is 11 and has just started getting into makeup – she watches lots of YouTube tutorials and stuff like that. She asked my wife at dinner if she ever wore makeup and my wife said 'no, I don't bother with it.'" Naturally, the niece asked why.

"My niece asked why and she gave a little speech about makeup being a waste of money and that she'd feel like she was lying to herself if she wore it and that she was 'happy with the face I have.' My sister got mad and said that she wore makeup a lot of the time and didn't feel like she was lying to herself and that it actually made her feel good," he said. "My wife responded, 'oh yeah. I bet you could quit anytime you want.' And then kinda laughed, which set my sister off and let's just say the rest of the evening was not enjoyable."

But it's important to remember that these messages were to an 11-year-old who was just discovering makeup. While the niece (and her mom) probably do look fantastic without it, it can be a touchy subject. After the meal, the Redditor talked to his wife about the conversation — and things got tense once again.

"When we got home, I asked my wife if she would please be less militant about makeup," he said. "I said it wouldn't kill her to wear it and I admit I did accuse her of being overbearing about her stance. She basically said that she never started conversations about makeup but that it's always other people bugging her to wear it and I said 'maybe they have a point and you’re being hardline over something really stupid and you need to get over yourself' and she got upset."

A few Redditors did make sure to mention his wedding photo comment. "Did you wear concealer under your eyes at your wedding? I'm just saying, you would have looked a lot better in the pictures if you did," wrote xenomouse. The criticism is legitimate, showcasing how much pressure women can get for not looking a certain way.

In fact, many people realized that these criticisms are quite vain. It seems as if his wife never liked wearing makeup, so this Redditor knew what he was getting into. "Why did he marry her if he wasn't happy how she always looks?" wrote Straight-Bee9783. "I would never think of making my husband wear make up to our wedding and he has sometimes bags under his eyes when he gets exhausted."

And that's something that Redditor LilLatte beautifully addressed. "Your niece asked your wife's perspective," the commenter said. "That is how your wife feels about makeup and it isn't wrong just because sister feels differently. She was asked her opinion and she gave it, and then sister completely jumped all over her opinion and your wife cut that [expletive] down… because she and everyone else knows… you weren't going to come to her defense." Wow.

And it's extremely well put. As individuals, we all have a right to decorate ourselves how we want. Some people opt for makeup; others don't. It's just like how some people love tattoos, and others can't stand them. It's a freedom of choice, and the way this Redditor's wife explained her point shouldn't have offended his sister so badly. But maybe she was feeling a bit self-conscious that day, or perhaps was under the impression that the wife of the original poster (OP) was dissuading her daughter from using makeup.

LilLatte dug into the real matter, exposing the OP for not being as supportive as he should. "Instead of preventing people from pushing your wife into feeling insecure with her natural looks and telling her to wear makeup, you join with them in their pestering and tell her she has no right to be so 'hardline' on her opinion," they added. "You know what would really improve those wedding photos? A better groom."

He shouldn't have to choose between his wife and his sister. Or maybe he could have offered his own thoughts at the dinner instead of staying silent and watching people pile on his wife. He should have told his niece that makeup is a fun tool, but it's not necessary. There are also plenty of reasons why people may refuse to wear it.

The wife might have been a little harsh with her words, but as Redditor engineeeeer7 noted, it's very possible she was pushed to that point. "She comes off as pretty militant with the kid but it's hard not sense some bias in your retelling of the story," they noted. "And I'm guessing you pressure her a fair bit so she probably blew up."