Marriage and relationships are all about communication and compromise. It is important to support one’s partner through their life struggles. One couple recently got into a fight over how to best do just that. An alcoholic husband got angry when his wife had some wine when out with friends.
The husband made this discovery when he saw an Instagram post, as his wife was not visibly intoxicated when she arrived home. He wants her to join him in his sobriety. His wife does not share her husband's problem with alcohol or his views on how best to support him. She does not think having an occasional drink is a big deal.
The husband took to Reddit to ask if he was wrong. He posts: “I (28M) am I recovering alcoholic. My father was an alcoholic when I was a child and I guess I caught it from him. I've been sober for about a year now, and I attend this recovery group once a week that is held by the Mormon church. I've been gaining an interest in their beliefs and have been considering conversion, but that's another conversation.”
"My wife (26F) went out with her friends this weekend and I found out from her friend's Instagram post that she had been drinking," the original poster (OP) continues. "She held a glass of wine in the photo, but she didn't appear drunk when she got home. I saw the post today, and I'm going to be honest, I freaked out. She has been so helpful and supportive during my recovery, and I can't believe she would do this to me."
"I confronted her as soon as I saw it, and she told me that because she wasn't drinking around me, it wasn't an issue. I told her that when we got married, we promised to support eachother through everything and this wasn't being supportive and a direct violation of our vows. She told me to get over myself and I lost it and told her that was a bad wife and that she wasn't committed to us and our relationship (we've been together for four years, married for one)."
"I told her that if she was pregnant, I wouldn't eat all of the food she couldn't eat to be supportive and she told me that she wouldn't expect that from me so I can't expect her to be sober and that I was being an a**hole," the husband continues. "After that, I just left and contacted the group leader from my recovery group and he let me chill at his house while I cooled down."
Reddit users have opinions. One user, CrystalQueen3000, thinks the husband is in the wrong, saying, “You’re the recovering alcoholic, not her. She’s allowed to drink when she’s not with you.”
Another user, chocolateforbrekky, also believes the husband is in the wrong. They even think the wife should be able to drink in front of her husband. They post, “She’s allowed to drink when she’s with him as well. My husband is an alcoholic and, while he doesn’t drink, I do (if I feel like it) at home, when we go out etc.”
The majority of users believe that the husband's actions and beliefs are just wrong. They feel sorry for his wife. Jjustingraham posts, “He's also a terrible, controlling, projecting husband and pee poor partner.” Late2reddit19 adds, “I hope OP’s wife sees this post or someone in her circle convinces her to divorce OP. He's really messed up in the head in more ways than one.”
These stories are based on posts found on Reddit. Reddit is a user-generated social news aggregation, web content rating, and discussion website where registered members submit content to the site and can up- or down-vote the content. The accuracy and authenticity of each story cannot be confirmed by our staff.
