Online dating is not easy. First you have to wade through matches on an app, make small talk with them to make sure they are relatively normal, and then finally set up a meeting. First dates feel like job interviews, with each party trying to hide all their “bad” qualities. One New York woman took to TikTok to share a unique trigger that was a deal breaker for her on a recent Hinge date.
Dafna took issue with the fact that her date chose not to get cheese on a burger after learning about the $3 upcharge. She went to the bathroom, paid the bill, and then left without saying goodbye. Many on the social media app called her out for her “extreme” behavior, saying the guy dodged a bullet.
“Why am I doing this to myself,” Dafna began her TikTok. She went on to tell the story of her date. “So we schedule to go to dinner, we’re sitting at the restaurant and he seems very nice. Not a catfish,” she continued.
“Things are going well, and the waitress comes over, she wants to take our order,” she recalled. She decided to get the fish, a branzino, and her date opted for a burger. This is when things got hairy for Dafna.
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Dafna broke down what happened next. The server asked if he wanted cheese on his burger, which was a natural follow-up question. “He asked, ‘Is this gonna be extra?’ And she says, ‘Yes it’s $3 extra.’ He said, ‘OK never mind,’” Dafna went on to say.
Dafna was not pleased with her date's reaction. “I’m like what the actual [expletive]? I’m like OK, I’m hungry, I'm gonna get my branzino and see what happens,” she recalled. “And he’s like, ‘Oh my God, you have to pay extra for everything these days,’ and I’m like, ‘Yeah. It’s New York City.’”
Dafna ate her fish but hatched an exit strategy in her mind. She decided to go to the bathroom and use that as a way out.
“I took my purse and I went to the waitress and was like, ‘Hey I just want to pay the bill.’ I just paid and walked out of the restaurant,” Dafna recounted. “So I texted him and said, ‘The check is taken care of, you should have gotten the cheese.’ Then I blocked him.”
Fellow TikTok users were perplexed by Dafna’s behavior. “That seems extreme. I mean maybe he isn’t always frugal but he’s struggling right now like so many people are,” one user commented.
Another use commented, “girlie…you are the problem.”
Other users think Dafna could have handled this better. “This wasn’t the power move you thought it was,” commented one user.
“Is this a joke? Please say it’s a joke. Ugh. Over cheese?” another asked.
“That’s a little harsh. I would have just never met up with him again,” agreed another.
Dafna’s video quickly went viral and even made its way over to Twitter. There were some users who understood Dafna’s point of view, but they were definitely in the minority.
“Worrying about $3.00 in NYC is nuts unless you’re in serious financial trouble. I can see why this would concern her,” wrote one user.
Dafna posted another video responding to the backlash. “Do you think I don’t know that I am crazy? I’m crazy. But you guys are taking it to a different level. You really need to take it easy. Some people are going through all my videos saying I’m ‘ugly’ and that I don’t deserve love. That’s not OK,” she said.
She went on to say she understands someone on a budget but not when they are out on a date. “When I go out on a date or to a restaurant with friends, I’m not going to [expletive] about money. I’m gonna enjoy myself and deal with it later,” she explained.
Surprisingly, this video made its way back to her date, even though he does not actively use social media. He thought the situation was funny. The pair are going on a second date. Maybe this is a story they will someday tell their grandchildren.