Traveling alone can be an intimidating process, but when you’re a single parent with a baby or handful of kids, this goes tenfold. Making all the decisions by yourself can be scary but also empowering. Think about it: You don’t have to make any compromises with your partner or friends; you can do what you want to do, when you want to do it. Well, so long as it’s child-friendly, of course.
Getting rid of that intimidation can be tricky, but sometimes all it takes is a good set of mottos to repeat to yourself every day. And if at first you don’t believe it, fake it till you do believe it. So, from ignoring the haters to ignoring feelings of embarrassment, here are our affirmation suggestions.
I will not focus on judgmental looks.
The world isn’t always kind to single parents, especially moms. There’s always going to be some traditionalist out there who can’t stand to see deviations from the nuclear family. There’s nothing wrong with standing up for yourself, but letting every judgmental look bring you down could ruin your vacation if you stress about it. It’s so much easier said than done, of course, but with practice, you can laugh them off and focus on the positive.
I will focus on what I want (not what I ought to).
There’s a certain pressure while on vacation to do everything, particularly tourist hot spots and artsy places. Say you go to Paris; it’s presumed you’ll be visiting the Eiffel Tower and the Arc de Triomphe, but what if you can’t be bothered looking at buildings all day? Forget what the guide books say; sit in the Parc Floral de Paris all afternoon reading books if you want, go shopping, go to the cinema to see a movie you'd probably see at home — who cares? It doesn’t have to be perfect. It’s your vacation. Do it your way.
I will not feel embarrassed about asking for help.
Whether it’s getting a stroller up some stairs or getting directions, there’s nothing wrong with relying on the kindness of strangers, when it’s safe to do so. You’re not Wonder Woman, nor should you be. You’re a great mother with human needs and skills, which also means you have your limits. So don’t try to be perfect, because perfect is overrated and unrealistic anyway. Staff members are there for a reason, too, and a huge part of being on vacation is letting someone else cook and clean for you so you can relax. So rest your feet and enjoy it!
I will eat what I want, when I want.
If there’s ever a time to not care about eating a balanced and healthy meal, it’s when you’re on vacation. Eat that pizza, enjoy those buñuelos, and book that all-you-can-eat buffet. No one who ate like a bird on vacation ever came back to say, "Oh I’m so glad I didn’t eat all that lovely cuisine!" So enjoy yourself, and don’t overthink it.
I will not sacrifice fun due to self-consciousness.
It can be difficult to do certain activities alone, even with children, due to the stigma that’s attached to it. Eating dinner without a partner? For some reason, people assume you’re lonely. Taking a selfie alone? "I wonder why she’s alone," they may say. Going roller skating with the kids? What if you fall over? What if, what if, what if. In actuality, most people don’t care; we only think they do due to our own anxieties. And if they for some reason do care and give you a weird look, you won’t remember it forever. You’ll regret not doing something way more in the long run.
I will be safe, but free.
Safety should be everyone's No. 1 concern when going on vacation, aside from just having a good time, that is. Traveling late at night as a woman with children, especially in an unfamiliar place, is scary. But that needn’t interrupt your vacation or ruin your trip. Researching your location’s safest walking routes is a must, as well as using reputable taxi companies. But don’t let the fear stop you from seeing the sights at whichever time or location you planned on.
I will not let opportunities go to waste.
Just because you’re not there with a romantic partner doesn’t mean you can’t go for that fancy meal or for that stroll down the beach in the moonlight; you can still appreciate the classical vibe of dating, you’re just dating yourself for the week. Don’t avoid stereotypically couple-y activities that you’d still like to do, because most of the time these activities are just as fun if not more fun by yourself or with your family than with a partner anyway.
