Some parents out there have very particular ideas for what they want their kids' futures to look like. This can vary by culture, upbringing, and other factors, but it can result in a lot of pressure on kids.
In some cases, it doesn't work out. Kids are, at the end of the day, their own people. If they grow up and decide what they want is different from what their parents want for them, there isn't much that can be done. In some families, however, it can cause serious discord.
One man took to Reddit to share his experience. He recently reconnected with his parents after 17 years of estrangement. The estrangement was caused by his choice in career, which didn't follow the family tradition of going into medicine. The original poster didn't follow his initial career path but has since found success, a fact his parents were incredibly surprised to learn.
OP began by explaining his parents' very specific plan for his future.
"My (37m) family comes from and is a long line of doctors," he explained.
"Being a doctor is the only acceptable profession in their eyes and anything aside from that is met with literal abandonment."
OP learned this was no joke the hard way.
"Which is what happened to me when I turned 17 and told my family I was NOT going to be a doctor but to build an acting career / social media career (youtube wasn't huge then) and supplement my income with small business endeavours," he explained.
"When I told my family this they kicked me out and we subsequently lost contact for 17 years."
OP's family went through a lot of changes during this time.
"During time they moved to the UK and my sister became a doctor and my older brother got into a very competitive stream for surgery (neurosurgery specialising in spinal tumour diagnosis and removal), which he has now finished," he continued.
"We reconnected when COVID hit and they told me they were moving back to Sydney for lifestyle reasons and because my brother has found a $750k a year job."
While they reconnected, they haven't taken much interest in OP's life.
"During the last 2 years they never asked me how my acting career / social media stuff went, and basically assumed I was just slumming in it Sydney," OP noted.
"To their credit they were correct in that I didn't 'make it big' in acting (maybe the world wasn't ready for a main stream leading role Indian…), or make it at all. I did however 'make it big' as an investment banker and recently made partner at the bank I work."
OP finally met up with them, and things didn't go great.
"This came to head on Friday when I met them for house shopping (I walked to meet them, and when they asked about my car, I just said I preferred to walk), and they realised the areas they wanted to live; despite being highly paid medical professionals, simply wasn't going to be happening, as the houses cost north of $20 million," he explained.
"When we decided to call it a day and regroup they suggested going to my place before going out to dinner."
OP's parents made assumptions about him and quickly realized how wrong they were.
"When we arrived at my house they thought I was renting a room and enquired how much rent was. I informed them that I wasn't renting and that this was my house," OP revealed.
"They lost their [expletive], accusing me of lying to them for years and only meeting up to rub their face in my 'probably illegally gained' wealth, and capped it off by informing me that they'll be living with me now instead of with my oldest brother, since they can't be seen living in a worse house then their son."
OP's first reaction was to laugh.
"I laughed at them and reminded them that they bet on my brother and sister not me, and that they have a better chance of living with my neighbours than me," he shared.
"At that point they threatened to 'cut me out of their will', to which I reminded them of the fact that they can't even afford to buy it my area, so their will and assets don't really matter to me."
Somehow, OP's siblings think he's the one who handled this badly.
"Now they aren't talking to me, and my brother and sister are saying I should have been proactive in letting them know of my success," he shared.
"I have a public linkedin profile, so they literally never Googled me."
Some commenters were skeptical of this story, but those who grew up in similar families stepped in to defend OP.
"They cut you out when you informed them that you were refusing to fit into the mold that they wanted you to fit into," one commenter wrote.
"They spat on your goals, even if the acting gigs didn't pan out, and then cut you out of their lives until it was convenient for them to have you back in their lives. You owe your parents no updates on your success when they had made it clear that they were not willing to support any other routes to success if it wasn't what fit their rigid definitions."
These stories are based on posts found on Reddit. Reddit is a user-generated social news aggregation, web content rating, and discussion website where registered members submit content to the site and can up- or down-vote the content. The accuracy and authenticity of each story cannot be confirmed by our staff.
