Planning a wedding can be such a stressful time for any bride-to-be and their partner and loved ones. Everything is so expensive and between deciding on the ideal venue, the food, and the guest list, there’s also a certain kind of etiquette that comes into play with the wedding guests and what they might be thinking of giving the couple as a gift for their big day.
In this Reddit AITA forum, a bride-to-be is planning a small wedding and since she’s been with her partner for a long time, they do not have a gift registry, but they’ve simply told their guests that if they’d like to make a small donation to their honeymoon fund, that would be appreciated. Things quickly turned sour when the original poster spoke to her cousin about this gift idea.
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Things started to go sour after a wedding bouquet request.
The OP explains that she messaged her cousin to see if she could do her bridal bouquet, to which her cousin told her it would cost $360, which broke down as $320 for the flowers and $40 for 30 minutes of her time. The OP offered that if her cousin wanted to donate the $40 to her honeymoon fund as her gift to the couple, the bride would be happy to pay her the cash for the floral arrangement.
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The OP explains that it was at this point where things turned sour because her cousin then explained that "she wasn’t planning on donating anything to [the] honeymoon fund because she was saving up for her own vacation next year." Her cousin also went on to state that even though it wasn’t a honeymoon, "it’s just as important." Is there an actual distinction here, especially considering one of the parties is getting married?
The OP claims that she doesn’t expect donations to her honeymoon fund, but her cousin’s tone caused this rift.
For those who might be wondering if the OP is singling this cousin out, she claims that she is "not expecting people to donate to the honeymoon fund," and she and her partner are footing the cost of the wedding, including the meals, for their guests. She also explains that she knows that some people may not have the means to donate anything to their honeymoon fund, but it was her cousin’s comment about having no one donating to her vacation fund that rubbed her the wrong way.
The OP explains that she is "not expecting anything for free" but her being so unwilling to donate $20 or $40 to her honeymoon fund "really annoyed" her and she wonders if it would be too harsh to disinvite her cousin from the wedding entirely. Does it sound like this bride-to-be is just being petty?
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Is this a classic case of the OP being a total bridezilla or was there something off with this cousin’s attitude?
The consensus in the comments of this Reddit AITA post tends to side with the cousin who may or may not be disinvited from the wedding. One commenter couldn’t believe that the bride-to-be just expected her cousin to "donate her time for free" while she likely wasn’t expecting that from her other vendors.
There were also several comments about the bride-to-be claiming that she didn’t expect gifts from anyone, but when this particular cousin told her she wasn’t donating to their honeymoon fund, she all of a sudden wanted to disinvite her.
One commenter called the OP "materialistic" because if she was really OK with people not giving them cash for their honeymoon fund, then she’d just let things be with her cousin instead of causing drama.
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