What to Know
Some people online are wishing that they had never heard the speech JD Vance gave at a Christmas party hosted at his residence. For some reason, the vice president decided to get behind a podium and deliver a speech about… his penis? At the beginning of the speech, Vance made it sound like he was going to give people a better sense of what it’s like to be VP. But by the end of it, he was boasting about his penis size. Now, people on social media are uncomfortable, embarrassed, and also not impressed by the conversations that are apparently taking place in the Oval Office.
According to Vance, people ask him what it’s like to be Vice President.
The Christmas party was meant to be a celebration for actor Sylvester Stallone, and when Vance started speaking, he told attendees that he would talk about Stallone soon enough. But first, he told a cringeworthy story with an uncomfortable penis joke in it.
Vance said that in a lot of ways, being VP is exactly like what you would expect. “But sometimes, you get these behind-the-scenes moments that I will never, ever forget for the rest of my life,” Vance asserted. The super memorable, profound moment in question? President Donald Trump’s desire to buy shoes for people, apparently.
“For example, today I’m in the Oval Office with the President of the United States and our great Secretary of State Marco Rubio, and we’re talking about something really, really important. ,” Vance continued. Despite the important nature of this conversation, President Donald Trump had something “much more important” to discuss: shoes.
“He peers over the resolute desk and he says, ‘Marco, JD, you guys have s—– shoes,'” Vance continued. “We gotta get you better shoes.”
At that moment, Trump started his shopping.
According to Vance, Trump grabbed a “catalog” to look for new shoes for Vance and Rubio. Vance added that there was “another politician in the room” as well, but he would not name that politician because the rest of the story might embarrass him.
Apparently, Trump found Vance’s shoes so terrible that he is now giving him four new pairs as a gift. So, during the conversation, Trump started asking for everyone’s shoe sizes. First, he asked Rubio, and Rubio said he wears a size 11.5. Then, he asked Vance, and Vance said he wears a size 13. And finally, he asked the unnamed politician, who wears a size 7.
Vice President JD Vance just dropped a hilarious Oval Office story leaving the entire room cracking up.
— Benny Johnson (@bennyjohnson) December 6, 2025
President Trump glanced over the Resolute Desk at VP Vance and Secretary Marco Rubio and said, “You guys have shitty shoes.”
Right then and there, Trump pulled out a shoe… pic.twitter.com/3Z2xyh9MZK
“The president, he kind of leans back in his chair and says, ‘You know, you can tell a lot about a man by his shoe size,'” Vance said. Then, with his wife, Usha Vance, standing beside him, he added, “We won’t ask the second lady for comment on that particular topic.”
People in the audience laughed, but online, others could not stop cringing. They couldn’t believe that these grown men found this so hilarious, and that Vance felt like he had to share the story with everyone. “The fact he thought this story was worthy telling gives us all you need to know about this man,” one person on Reddit wrote. “They had a d— measuring contest in the Oval Office…someone save us.”
People couldn’t decide what disturbed them more …
the fact that Vance spoke about his penis, or the fact that these politicians really spent their time talking about shoes. “Americans are hungry and unemployed and these idiots are worried about shoe sizes,” someone wrote in response. Another person agreed, writing, “People are literally having trouble buying food and healthcare and here is the VP acting like a 13 yr old.”
People also noticed that Vance’s wife looked “so incredibly uncomfortable” as Vance told this story about his penis size. And while people were not exactly surprised that Trump decided to talk about shoes over something “really, really important,” they still didn’t see it as something to brag about. One person summed it up with, “So the President…: 1. Thinks it’s more important to talk about shoes than anything else. 2. Openly bullies a colleague. And you celebrate this.”
