Martin Short has been through a lot. Most recently, he lost his 42-year-old daughter, Katherine, who died by suicide in February. He doesn’t talk about his personal life all that frequently, but after her death, he thought it was especially important to speak up about mental health. He knows that so many other people struggle with their mental health as well — and also navigate grief — and he thinks speaking about it can show people that they’re not alone in what they’re going through.
During a recent interview, Martin revealed that he’s “sad” right now. But of course he is. And there’s nothing wrong with that. It sounds like accepting the negative emotions he experiences had made a profound difference in his life. “It’s OK to be sad,” he told IndieWire.
In addition to losing his daughter, Martin lost both of his parents and a sibling at a young age.
Before he turned 21, both of his parents and his older brother David died. Martin was only 21 years old when David died in a car accident. In 2010, his wife, Nancy Dolman, died of ovarian cancer. She was 58 years old.
When speaking to IndieWire, Martin revealed that his friends have played such an important role in his life. “When loss and grief suddenly or subtly encompasses your life, it’s your friends and family that help you through and remind you of the journey. So you find the light,” he told the publication.
He also revealed that he’s never gone to therapy.
When he was younger, it sounds like it didn’t really seem like an option. So, he found other ways to cope. “I’ve never been in therapy,” he said. “Never. Never. When my brother and parents died, and I was now in this big house with the housekeeper at 19 and 20, it was Hamilton, Ontario, 1970. So it wasn’t about therapy; it was about no one. I didn’t know anyone. In Hamilton, it’s just you.”
However, he also had older siblings who looked out for him. “I biked all over the city,” he continued. “I’d bike up the hills and paint and write. I was the youngest of five, so now there’s four. But the (others) took over aggressively, nurtured and worried, and that’s how I continued. You learn to do it.”
Under certain circumstances, he would go to therapy. “Listen, ideally, if no one needed a crutch for anything, wouldn’t they be stronger? ” he told the publication. “So, believe me, if I was suddenly depressed or in despair, but didn’t know why, then I’d run to a therapist. But I’ve never been that way.”
And part of what helps him cope is accepting that it’s OK to have negative emotions. “I’m sad now, but you know what?” he added. “I should be sad now. It’s OK to be sad.”
Previously, he spoke candidly about his daughter’s mental health challenges.
On CBS Sunday Morning, he explained that, ultimately, his daughter had an illness that she really struggled with.
“Mental health and cancer, like my wife’s, are both diseases, and sometimes with diseases, they are terminal,” he said. “And my daughter fought for a long time with extreme mental health, borderline personality disorder, other things, and did the best she could until she couldn’t.”
He also spoke about how this experience isn’t a unique one, which is why he feels compelled to talk about it. “If I said to the audience, any audience I was in, ‘How many have lost anyone from suicide?’ you’d be stunned by the hands that would go (up),” Martin said.
“So, why pretend that this is your own pain?” he added. “Maybe by sharing your pain, it will help other people’s pain.”
READ NEXT: Depression In Children Is Real, But How Do We Recognize The Signs?
