Relationships are all about communication. You need to be clear with boundaries, wants, and needs. If you fail to communicate properly, things can get a bit bumpy.
That’s what happened to one couple when a somewhat clueless boyfriend posted video footage of his girlfriend’s minor car accident on YouTube without asking her permission first. When the girlfriend found out about it, she was less than pleased. At first the boyfriend did not understand, but with the help of Reddit, he realized the error of his ways pretty quickly.
Begin the beguine.
“A few months ago, my girlfriend crashed our car and swiped a parked car while getting out of the driveway and about a year ago she rear ended someone,” the boyfriend begins in his Reddit post. “I posted the video from home security and the dashcam video for each incident on youtube as educational material in case it might help learner drivers etc. I got responses from some accident compilation video creators and gave them permission to use the videos.”
Always get permission to post.
The boyfriend failed to get his girlfriend’s consent to do any of this. “There is nothing wrong with the videos, she did not do a hit and run or anything and dealt with both situations well,” he continued. “All then show is the accidents and her getting out of the car, putting her hands on her head and inspecting the damage. Recently apparently someone sent anonymous messages to her and some of her friends and coworkers with a link to the video I uploaded.” Busted.
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She got mad.
Let’s just say his girlfriend was not very happy about it. “She got really mad at me and called me an AH for uploading the videos without asking her. However both camera systems were put by me and I manage the devices. She then accused me of sending the anonymous message when it was not me,” he went on to say.
Am I the problem?
“I have since deleted the video but some of her friends found the copies other people had included and teased her about it,” he said. “I don't understand since it is not such a big deal, these things happen all the time and there are loads of similar videos on the internet, and it is not even that easy to recognize her especially in the home security video.”
Commenters are unanimous.
Reddit users unanimously agreed this boyfriend was a huge [expletive] for doing this to his girlfriend. Central to their argument was the concept of consent. He did not ask her permission to post the videos, which is a huge no-no. It all goes back to communication.
What was he thinking?
“I'm calling bs on your 'educational' intent. You took an embarrassing moment and uploaded it for the universe to see. Shared it with others. Without her consent. What did you think was going to happen?” asked one user.
Others weighed in.
“How hard is it to ask if she's okay with you posting the videos? It takes seconds to ask,” chimed in another user.
“Congrats you're about to be single,” joked another.
The boyfriend sees the light.
After getting criticized in the comments, the boyfriend saw the error of his ways. He updated his post: “Oh I get it I was the AH, I did not realize how embarrassing it would be for her as I post dashcam videos all the time. I will apologize to her again and make it up to her and take her some place nice.”
These stories are based on posts found on Reddit. Reddit is a user-generated social news aggregation, web content rating, and discussion website where registered members submit content to the site and can up- or down-vote the content. The accuracy and authenticity of each story cannot be confirmed by our staff.
