It can be tricky navigating a bullying situation. On the one hand you want your children to learn the necessary life skills of settling conflict with their peers. On the other hand, if adults are too hands off, a child could end up suffering deeply. Sadly, more than a few parents have only learned the depth of their child’s suffering at the hands of a bully after it was too late.
One father made the decision to intervene to avoid facing the worst possible outcome. But instead of acting out of anger, he approached the situation with curiosity. He learned something about the boy bullying his son in the process, and ended up seeing the entire situation in a new light.
An older boy was picking on Aubrey Fontenot’s son.
Aubrey Fontenot learned that an 11-year-old boy was often picking on his 8-year-old son Jordon, from his daily progress reports, according to The Houston Chronicle. “I asked my son about it and he told me the boy was messing with him and was too rough,” Fontenot explained.
Going through the proper chain of command, Fontenot contacted the school first. They told him they would take care of it. But a week later, things hadn’t changed. Fontenot met with the older boy’s mother in the school office. During the meeting, she shared that her family had fallen on hard times and were currently without a home, Upworthy reports.
“I decided I wanted to talk to the boy myself, and his mom gave me permission,” Fontenot said. The boy, Tamarion, admitted to Fontenot that he kept bothering his son because he was jealous of him, particularly his clean clothes. “He said he was getting made fun of by the other kids,” Fontenot explained. “They said his shoes were cheap and his clothes were dirty.”
Fontenot wanted to help his son and Tamarion at the same time.
So Fontenot took his son’s bully shopping. “I figured I could help both him and my son, and better the situation.” Not only did he buy the boy some new clothes, he took the shopping trip as an opportunity to impart some wisdom.
“I told him he’s a great person and this [situation] doesn’t make him bad,” Fontenot says. “I also told him that no matter what’s going on, you have to walk around with your head up and chest up. This world is tough. You can’t let what people say or do bring your self-confidence down.”
He did more than just take him shopping.
Later, Fontenot launched a GoFundMe for Tamarion and his family. They exceeded their goal. By the end of the shopping trip, Tamarion and Jordon were speaking. Fontenot told them, “From here, this is nothing. Shake hands and from now on you are brothers and you protect each other.”
While Fontenot wanted to share lesson with Tamarion, he had one for his son, too. “Every war isn’t won with your hands,” he said. “It’s easy to react to first emotions but sometimes you have to outsmart a situation.”
