Things can get tense between two former partners who share children, especially when one or both of them begin dating someone else. One man has shared to Reddit that his wife of two years has become a little worried about her ex-husband's girlfriend … but he thinks that she is taking her worry way too far.
The man writes, "I got married to my wife Claire 2 years ago, She has a 6 year daughter (my stepdaughter) that she shares custody of with her ex husband Adam. So Adam has not dated anyone eversince he and Claire got separated, Claire always talked about how this was a good thing because she believes that my stepdaughter is better off without a witch stepmom to boss her around and abuse her."
His wife thinks that her ex introduced their daughter to his girlfriend too soon.
"Then, Adam started seeing his now girlfriend about 8 months ago, Claire wasn't happy about it-in fact- she was livid that Adam introduced my stepdaughter to his girlfriend so soon," he continued. "Claire demanded meetings with Adam's girlfriend to test and see what kind of stepmom she will be for my stepdaughter, I didn't give it much attention because of the drama and always having MIL involved as well."
Then his wife took things a little too far.
He adds that his wife's worry has now crossed a line:
"However, I very recently found out that Claire installed several cameras in Adam's house while he and his girlfriend were away on a trip, Clair had the key to Adam's house because most of my stepdaughter's stuff is there. Keep in mind that I found out by looking at the chat Claire had with MIL so she was in on it too, It irked me because that is a total breach of privacy but when I confronted Claire she said she did this because Adam's girlfriend was going to move in soon and she wanted to see how she treats my stepdaughter."
He told her he doesn't agree.
"I told her this was wrong but she said it was all temporary til Adam's girlfriend is in 'the clear'. I still wasn't convinced and suggested she remove the cameras because of the huge legal troubles once Adam finds out but she lost her temper on me saying I should stay out of it because I clearly don't care about my stepdaughter's wellbeing and happiness, but she had no evidence or even reason to believe Adam's girlfriend might mistreat my stepdaughter."
She's refusing to back down.
"Claire said she just wants to 'double check' and Adam does not need to know. But I disagreed and said that I will tell him if she won't remove the cameras which made her lose it on me and get MIL to shut me down and get me to stay in my lane but I couldn't. Claire said if I tell Adam then we gonna have a problem and urged me to mind my own business because Adam isn't more important than my relationship with her so I shouldn't even entertain the idea of telling him and upsetting claire who is just trying to make sure her daughter's future stepmom isn't some witch stepmom in the making."
People are pointing out the serious flaws in her plan.
One person advised him, "Please tell him to protect yourself and your wife from legal and criminal problems. Edit to add from your other comments: if you think your wife will blame you, she will and she will drag you into whatever legal and criminal consequences arise.
"You also need to handle this to protect your stepdaughter emotionally. Is she supposed to feel safe with people her own mother doesn’t trust?
"The cameras are also a great way for your wife to lose custody of her daughter, so think of that too."
The husband is also involved even if he doesn't want to be.
Another commenter added, "There is no rationalizing this. She either A: takes down the cameras, B: you tell Adam, or C: you call the cops. What she is doing is highly illegal and you just knowing about it and saying nothing makes you complicit. Take care of this problem now. While you're at it, you may want rethink your relationship with Claire because that's a whole lotta crazy going on. And apparently the apple didn't fall far from the tree."
There also might be implications for his own relationship.
Another commenter pointed out that there might be other things going on, too: "If I were you, I would take a long hard look at your wife and ask yourself if she is really over the Ex. The fact she celebrated him not having a relationship and moving on and how she reacted when the girlfriend came in to the picture.
"Worse case scenario, she not over her ex. Best case scenario, she is a control freak with no boundaries."
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