As parents, it's up to each of us to make decisions for our children. In the early years, those decisions cover just about every part of our children's lives, including what they eat, what they wear, and even how we clean the kids themselves.
One man recently shared on Reddit that he walked in on his girlfriend deploying a pretty curious tactic while cleaning up their daughter after lunch — one that really bothered him.
He says his girlfriend has a strange habit.
"I (36m) girlfriend Pat (31f) has a 6 month old daughter Jay (fake names) who we adore," the man began. "They both live in my house as we've been staying together for a year and a half and she's SAH. My only problem is that my Pat has a weird attitude about how she treats Jay after feeding her in the morning."
And he's not sure it's OK.
"I'm all for making Jay feel special and all that but on Saturday, she was feeding Jay with a spoon and there was food on Jay's mouth but instead of cleaning it with a tissue/napkin, she used her mouth to clean it and in the process appeared to be licking her tongue."
The girlfriend says that's just what she prefers to do.
"I ask her why she did that and her answer shocked me," he continued. "She said that that's how she prefers to clean her mouth after feeding her so I asked her why I haven't seen that before but Pat said she thought I will think its weird."
Her girlfriend walked out of the house.
"I told her that it was a weird thing to do and also a dangerous habit since she could transmit some bacteria to Jay because her immunity was still very weak. Pat got angry and left to her parents house after leaving Jay with me."
A lot of people see the problem.
Plenty of commenters are worried that the kid will think this behavior is OK.
"This will be teaching her that this is normal and it is 100% not," one commenter said. "Children are parrots and they mimic their parents both vocally and physically, and Jay may try to do this once she starts school. I could totally see her trying to do this on another child, thinking she was being helpful, and getting in trouble in kindergarten. Even if it works out okay, things like this can affect a kid will into adulthood."
No one has ever seen anything like it.
Lots of people also said the behavior is really … unique. "I've taken care of dozens of children and seen all sorts of family dynamics but this is the first time I've heard of licking the inside of their child's mouth," said a commenter. "That's like really weird. Why does her mouth need to be 'clean'?"
This is also a safety issue.
One person brought up a really serious point that is worth thinking about:
"When young children learn about safety, they’re taught that their mouth is a private part just like the areas covered by their underwear. No one is supposed to touch or put things (body parts) in their private parts. Mom is violating that rule."
At the very least, the behavior is uncomfortable.
"Stop the behavior now or it will evolve," said another commenter. "My coworkers daughter will come up to me and lick my arm randomly. She tried to lick my face once and I had to get after her. Her parents kind of let her do whatever because she’s their cute little baby, but I would prefer a 4 year old doesn’t randomly lick me."
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