Have you ever had your fortune read? It's always fun to see what the future may have in store for us, even if we don't necessarily believe it to be true.
Fortune cookies can be a load of fun. We've all gone out for some delicious Chinese food with friends or family and opened our fortunes at the end of the meal. Sometimes they can hit very close to home, and we might even keep them in our wallets for good luck. Even if we don't think this slip of paper has laid out our entire future, it can still be a nice little reminder to live our best life.
Other times, though, these fortunes can make absolutely no sense. They can be so utterly absurd that all there is to do is laugh until there is no air left in our lungs.
These 15 fortunes range from bizarre to hilarious, making it hard not to give at least a little chuckle.
Did any of these make you laugh out loud? What's the funniest fortune you've ever received? Let us know in the comments and please SHARE with your family and friends to spread the joy!
Thumbnail source: Flickr
1.
"Come back later… I am sleeping. (Yes, cookies need their sleep, too.)"
Do they, though?
2.
"About time I got out of that cookie."
I've always wondered how they got inside the cookie in the first place.
3.
"You can't have everything… where would you put it all?"
I guess you could always get a storage unit.
4.
"It is better to have beans and bacon in peace than cakes and ale in fear."
It's hard to tell what this one is even trying to get across. What's wrong with beans and bacon?
5.
"Ignore previous cookie."
There can only be one.
6.
"I see money in your future… it is not yours though."
I like precisely half of this fortune.
7.
"Pick another fortune cookie."
Sorry, wrong number. Try again!
8.
"Warning: Do not eat your fortune."
It is not in fact part of the cookie, but you'd have to be pretty dim to eat a piece of paper. Give us some credit, fortune cookie!
9.
"To lower your stress level, get a cat."
Now this one I can get on board with.
10.
"You will be hungry again in one hour."
This one turned out to be true. But, then again, when is this not true?
11.
"You are not illiterate."
Thank you for the reminder, I suppose.
12.
"A nice cake is waiting for you."
I like to make sure there is always cake in my future. Always.
13.
"A new hat will brighten your day and give you an updated look."
So the problem this whole time was the hat? I should have known!
14.
"Change is inevitable, except for vending machines."
Face it, you're not getting that 15 cents back. You're not even guaranteed to get the cookies you just bought because that row always gets stuck. Why do you keep trying?
15.
"Be good to yourself. Dessert three times per week is OK."
I don't need the encouragement, really. But, since you say so…
Have you ever gotten a funny fortune like these? Let us know in the comments and please SHARE with your family and friends on Facebook!
