First comes love, then comes marriage, then comes an eBay post riddled with baggage — or at least that’s the experience for one jilted ex-husband in Germany.
It’s understood that a divorce is one of the most emotionally traumatic and financially painful things a person can go through, but when feelings of betrayal enter the equation, things can get sticky.
Divorce settlements often force spouses to split their belongings 50-50, and one man in Germany expressed just how he felt about his ex-wife, Laura, by cutting all of their belongings in half — literally!
That’s right. This man took every one of their possessions and neatly cut them in two using his power tools with such precision, they’re left looking eerily beautiful.
He is selling his half of everything on eBay, where each item has a bitterly funny description in German, some of which seem to even suggest that Laura had been unfaithful.
Keep in mind there are two sides to every story, and we have no idea what Laura’s is, but whatever motivated a man to cut some of these items in half must have been pretty severe…
“The car is quite well preserved for its age, but there are some signs of wear. In particular, half is missing,” he wrote as a description on eBay.
“In my opinion, this conversion is the perfect solution for users who want to save space, but can not afford a MacBook Air.”
“There’s no need for cuddling stuffed animals – for such things, there are affectionate co-workers.”
“In recent years, I’ve spent many beautiful evenings on this sofa with my woman. She did not find the evenings so beautiful, which is why my ex-wife now sits on another couch.”
“The wheel moves despite minor limitations, and the front brake engages perfectly.”
“Unlike my ex-wife, I cannot say anything bad about the bed, really, have always slept well in it.”
“It’s the perfect phone for people who do not like to make calls.”
“The chairs are super as an art installation.”
“Watching TV alone is already depressing enough. The device is very compact and has several inputs, but am not sure whether they all work.”
“Whoever wonders where the second half is may want to check with my ex-wife.”
“I offer here, in my opinion, the best REM album… 'Everybody Hurts' (how true !!!) and 'Nightswimming' are the best passages on it yet.”
“Unfortunately, I can offer only half… But no matter, I have made sure that the best sketches are on my half”
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To see him in the act, watch the video below.
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