As a lot of parents know, finding child care can be an expensive quest. If you don't have family nearby who are able to help out, you're often at the mercy of local day cares, preschools, and babysitters, all of which can be quite pricey.
One woman recently shared on Reddit that she and her husband lucked out when they were offered free babysitting from her mother-in-law's friend. Unfortunately, things took an odd turn.
Her mother-in-law insisted that the friend babysit.
"I (26 F) am the mother of two kids (4F and 3M) My husband (27M) and I both work office jobs," the mom began. "Due to this, we need someone to watch the kids while we aren’t home. We mostly had babysitters but a few months back my MIL (48F) suggested that her friend could watch them for free. I told her it wasn’t necessary since we could afford a babysitter just fine, but she insisted."
At first, things were great.
"I didn’t really see any harm in it after she kept asking, so i gave in and her friend (45F) started babysitting our kids," she continued. "Everything was perfect for the first few months, she was always on time and always fed my kids and put them to bed at the time I suggested."
But then ... things got weird fast.
"My kids seemed to really like her, but about a few weeks ago my oldest came to me and asked me if I was their real mommy. I was confused, and asked her what she meant. Well turns out, MILs friend had been telling my kids that they were her babies, and when they protested saying they werent , she would yell at them saying that I was just their money maker and that she was their real mommy."
She and her husband hired a babysitter.
"I told my husband about this and he hired a babysitter on the spot. Then me and him called my MIL and told her about the situation, we told her that we weren’t going to have her friend over anymore because it made us uncomfortable. We even told her what my kid had told me."
Now her mother-in-law is mad.
"Well, MIL didn’t take it well. Over the phone she started screaming, saying that quote on quote 'my friend doesn’t have any kids or grandchildren, so your kids are the closest things she’s had to it, and you’re going to take that away from her?!'"
The woman feels bad, but not too bad.
"My husband and I tried to calm her down, but after a bit we just hung up," the mom explained. "I received a photo of MIL friend crying on MIL couch later that night.
"I feel horrible for making her upset, but I don’t like how she was telling my kids these things. I understand that she doesn’t have kids, but that doesn’t excuse her behaviour."
People are freaked out.
People on Reddit completely understand the mom's reaction.
"Would your MIL ever help your friend see them?" said one commenter. "To the point of taking the kids behind your back? I’d take them to a few sessions with a therapist. They were clearly confused and the damage this unhinged woman did can run deeper than you know right now. Kids internalize that kind of stuff."
Nannies are especially uncomfortable.
"I work as a pro nanny, and this is giving me major heebie-jeebies," said another commenter. "If you keep her, one day you’ll come home to your kids gone. Or at the very least, they’ll end up with a serious complex. Kids need safety and security from their parents, and having someone say you aren’t their real mom when you are will hinder their emotional and mental development."
Some think her mother-in-law might have been in on it.
A commenter noted: "I’m going to hazard a guess from her reaction that your MiL already knew what her friend was doing. Please be careful."
The friend could even be doing something criminal.
"It’s not your job to provide a stranger with pseudo grandkids," said a commenter. "The hand that rocks the cradle level craziness here & I can’t believe your MIL Thinks it’s ok for her friend to try to Alienate your kids from their parents ( that’s a crime btw) I would never allow that woman near your kids again she is unbalanced ( & mil isn’t far behind)."
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