Let's talk about something that a lot of new moms have to go through — breastfeeding and pumping. While many moms opt for formula, the ones who don't find themselves physically becoming their baby's primary source of nutrition. As the food supply, your schedule is whatever the baby's schedule is. And waking up at 3 a.m. for a couple of months is all part of it. It can be exhausting. If you're in a situation where you're the only mom in your group, you can also feel quite isolated.
That's why it's so important for moms to support each other. Too many times there are situations where moms try to bring each other down based on their own insecurities. There's no right way to parent — and being supportive of others, even if you don't necessarily agree with their opinions on screen time and appropriate snacks, will make everyone's life a lot easier.
Being a mom in the office is even more difficult since it combines your personal and work lives in a way that may be uncomfortable. That's why this particular project, showcased by Audrey Gelman, is so inspiring. Created by women from all over the world, it's quite inspirational and the perfect pat on the back that every mother needs to hear.
Audrey needed to use an airport lactation pod at LaGuardia Airport, and she was stunned to find that women who had used it before her had lined it with notes and well-wishes. The notes are all short and sweet, yet a good reminder that women aren't alone. Every mom out there has struggled with things like time management, breastfeeding issues, lack of sleep, and depression. This wall is like an unexpected hug you didn't know you needed.
Audrey is known best for being a businessperson. Three years ago, she founded a social club called The Wing in New York City, which helped connect women. She also helped work on Hillary Clinton's 2008 campaign and continued personally supporting her in 2016. So she's no stranger to the concept of women supporting women.
Just this year, she had her first child — a son named Sidney Allen Zechory — with her husband, Genius cofounder Ilan Zechory. As her Instagram proves, Sidney has been the highlight of her life. But like all new mothers, Audrey admitted she felt a little overwhelmed. Suddenly she had a newborn and a somewhat new, growing business, and juggling both is quite hard.
Women often feel like they need to do it all. And sometimes, we have to in order to pay the bills. Motherhood never gets completely easy, but the first year alone is filled with such panic and worry. And if you're also breastfeeding and pumping, you're losing hours every day. The phrase "It takes a village" is very true, but some women don't even have that kind of support available.
"The notes were sappy but they were the only things I needed to read in that moment," Audrey wrote on Instagram. "'You are enough' 'it gets better' 'feel proud of yourself for what you’ve created.' Those simple messages of encouragement and the recognition that so many have been through this before made me feel less alone."
She noticed something else as well. Plenty of women noted how thankful they were to even have a pod to privately pump in. That's an indicator that women usually don't get the chance to be alone during pump sessions, or feel completely private. That said, people still feel the need to call out women who breastfeed in public, so it's almost like women are told to do a job that they're given no equipment for.
"The gratitude these women expressed for having a pod – a little, modest pod – in the sea of commerce and throngs of business travelers made me remember why I care so much about what I’ve created, and why it’s so important women have spaces to contain all this [expletive] we do and feel in our lives that no one ever sees," Audrey wrote. Those tiny notes were reminders that so many women passed through that pod feeling like they weren't enough. In all honesty, they were probably doing more than they should have.
Plenty of women responded to Audrey's post. One of them happened to be Christene Barberich, the co-founder of Refinery29. "You are enough, you are amazing, you are doing it all, even if it often feels impossible…just keep doing it, you inspire us all to be better to ourselves and each other ," she wrote.
Laura Brown, the editor of InStyle, also supported the overall message, referring to Audrey's find as "wondrous." Prior to InStyle, Laura worked with Harper's Bazaar and has openly admitted that she enjoys the concept of a big network — which in a way, is much like this project. "You need to be stimulated by people and things all the time. You can’t do that in a vacuum, you can’t do that with two people around you," she said to USA Today.
Even Post-It loved the project. The company asked Audrey for her permission to use the photos, which she agreed to. That means that this may very well spread into something good, which it should. Any opportunity for women to get an extra boost in confidence is an opportunity worth pursuing.
If you're reading this and need a pick-me-up, here are a few things to remember. When your child cries in public, or if your newborn has a massive blowout on a road trip, or if you go into work covered in spit-up, you're not alone. And nobody should be judging you for it. (If they do, they probably don't have kids themselves.)
Life gets really wild when a baby comes into the picture. Even if you love your child with all of your heart, it makes sense to sometimes long for the easier days, when you could leave the house to check the mail by yourself without coordinating it with another adult. Parenthood takes away a sense of freedom, which might make a new mom feel even more alone.
People just tend not to share those moments on Instagram, which is a shame. Because even if you know in your heart that bad stuff rarely gets documented, it's hard not to trust what you visually see. If it's getting to you, a social media break may be the best thing for your own mental health. When things are tough, sometimes happy images can push you over the edge.
But no matter how hard it is, these days are few and far between. Eventually, your baby will eat solid foods. Soon after, they'll be able to feed themselves. And even though life will never be the same again, you'll be so happy about the balance that you've created. As the pod in LaGuardia states, "Be kind and gentle with yourself. You are enough."
