Parenting is hands down the hardest job in the world.
For foster parents, the intense emotions of parenthood are even more complicated, because part of fostering is knowing that eventually you'll lose this little one from your life.
It would take a pretty hard-hearted person to foster a child without becoming attached, and foster parents? Well, they aren't exactly a hard-hearted bunch. No one knows that better than Rachel Hillestad.
Hillestad is a mom, both to her own biological children and to foster kids in need. She opens her heart and home to little ones in the foster system for as long as they need to be with her, and she makes no apologies for growing attached to the kiddos in her care.
In fact, she has some incredibly beautiful words on the subject, reinforcing the truth that fostering is about giving kids a sense of safety, no matter how much it hurts you when you have to let them go.
Scroll through below to read them in full.
Rachel Hillestad tells LittleThings she never expected that a few quick, instinctive words about fostering would go viral so quickly.
The raw emotion of the words that she wrote in tears, thinking of a foster child she recently cared for, struck a chord with readers all over the world.
On Facebook, where she first posted them, they quickly racked up nearly 40,000 shares and thousands upon thousands of comments.
It's not hard to see why: Hillestad taps directly into the emotion at the heart of caring for a vulnerable child. Read her words in full below.
It took his left-behind toothbrush to undo me.
I'm sitting here in a parking lot sobbing my guts out.
He was mine for two and a half weeks, but those days and nights saw him smile, sleep through the night instead of freezing awake in terror, swing for hours on the swings my kids take for granted.
He called me Mama and I told him every time I left that if I said I would come back, I would.
I prepared him for his new home as well as I could, but now it's nap time and his new mom says he misses me.
I texted her a picture to show him.
The number one thing people say to me is, "I could never do foster care. I would get too attached."
Guess what: I'm just like you. I "got attached."
I was the only one who could get him to sleep or knew exactly what kind of jam he liked on his toast.
I helped him through his diarrhea and got frustrated when he broke Christmas ornaments. I watched him as he slept.
My answer to those people who say that is this: I absolutely get attached.
I wonder where they are now. They visit me in my dreams, and sometimes I wake up with a wet face.
It hurts. Sometimes in those moments it hurts to breathe.
You know what I know even MORE, though? I'd rather these sweet babies know my love than never know it.
I would carry their hurt inside my own adult heart if it meant there was less in their tiny sad one.
There is absolutely no reason that an eight year old who watched his mother be murdered not know the love of a stranger.
It's absolutely criminal that a two year old sit in a social worker's office for two days in dirty clothes because I'm afraid I'd get too attached.
I got attached. Getting attached has been the greatest pleasure and honor of my entire life.
It's impossible not to be moved by Hillestad's words, because what's she's describing is just what a mom does: she absorbs hurt and pain so that the little ones she loves don't have to feel it.
If you'd like to learn more, Hillestad blogs at rachelhillestad.com, and can also be found on Facebook and Instagram discussing parenting, fostering, and plenty of other subjects.
If you're interested in becoming a foster parent, Hillestad recommends AdoptUsKids to learn more about state-by-state programs.
Please don't forget to SHARE her powerful words so that it reaches everyone who has ever fostered or considered fostering!
