Danny Wakefield has over 24,000 followers. He's a professional manny, and he loves kids. He's also pregnant with his own.
Danny is openly trans and a refreshing member of the LGBTQ community. He has a sense of humor, and he knows that not too many people have seen a pregnant man before. But as he's showcasing, it's quite beautiful.
Aside from being a manny and a future father, he's so much more — an animal lover, an optimist, and someone who loves to dream. Being a parent was something he always thought would happen in his life. So now he's on his way.
"Ever since I was a young child, I've found myself surrounded by babies," he said on his blog. "I used to think that it was ironic that no matter where in the world I was or why I was there, I was always in the presence of young beings. As I've grown, I've found that it wasn't irony that was drawing me to babies and young children; it was my destiny."
In November, he's going to welcome baby Wilder Lea. And here's how he's handling pregnancy as a male.
"The first time that I knew I wanted to be a manny was when I was twelve years old. It was at this age that I started babysitting regularly, and would often find myself daydreaming about becoming Angelina Jolie's nanny," he said. "At the time, she didn't even have children, but as her family has grown and blossomed, I am able to see why my twelve-year-old self was drawn to her." As a manny, he's learned a lot about child development.
"Being a professional manny has not only taught me a tremendous amount about children, but also about family dynamics and how to navigate relationships with parents," he said. "I've learned how to create environments that open lines of communication while also empowering parents [to] be the best they can be, all along continuing to create a space for them to lean into the support I'm able to provide as a manny."
Of course, there's some stigma about being a male nanny. And that's something Danny is well-aware of. "They see that my gender doesn't quantify the quality of care that I am able to provide for children; my love and passion for children [do]," he said. "As a manny, I can be mothering, nurturing, and be an example of positive masculinity all at the same time. I strive to create an environment where my kids feel safe to shed stereotypes and labels."
Danny first started his Instagram back in 2018. It seemed like a good way to help him navigate his life between his transition, sobriety, and eventually parenthood. Soon, he racked up followers. It seems as if his posts are always sincere, and his is a wonderful journey to follow.
Danny announced his pregnancy back in April, with a glowing photo. He's holding up his ultrasound, and you can tell this was the title he always wanted. "I was born alongside a miracle baby, so it only makes [sense that] I give birth to one," he said. "I'm beyond thrilled to announce the first quarantine baby, coming December 2020. Little one, your papa is soooo excited to greet you. Don't EVER stop dreaming and keep breaking down doors for others to walk through."
From there, Danny kept showing photos of his growing bump. He was fully aware that most of the other expectant parents at his gynecologist were women, but he didn't let that stop him from being proud and present. "It's all pregnant women, and one obviously pregnant guy," he wrote. "Here's to normalizing trans pregnancy!"
Based on his own life, Danny didn't want to necessarily share the sex of the baby. Aware that sex is something that is assigned, he believes it isn't something worth celebrating. The baby's name, however, was — and he shared that he was going with Wilder Lea. "I celebrate all of the things my body can do, all of the ways I can be seen, and the limitless possibilities in front of us," he wrote on Instagram. "I can be both and neither, while loving me all along the way."
Danny's journey is an interesting one. When women typically get pregnant, they view their body in a different way. For many women, it's a beautiful transformation. Danny is also feeling that, yet in a masculine body that he's finally comfortable in. And he's admitted that the process of pregnancy only makes him love his body even more.
"I was born to be both, a trans masculine guy who carries his own child, and to help change the reality of what's possible," Danny said on Instagram. "This pregnancy process has me falling in love with my masculine body even more than I thought possible. There are two heart beats within me right now, within my curvy, hairy, muscular, masculine, male body."
This June, Danny chose to celebrate his first Father's Day. "It's a path many before me have taken and one I hope to show others that they can also," he wrote. "Fatherhood is what I choose to create while instilling the values that my father taught me; unconditional love and acceptance. When people are loved exactly for who they are, they blossom into the being their soul was sent here to be."
Danny is a reminder that parents, in general, come in all shapes and sizes. In your life, you'll meet children who come from broken homes, single-mom situations, single-dad situations, and families that include two mothers or two fathers. As long as every one of those arrangements includes a lot of love, the kid will be fine.
And it seems like young Wilder will be so lucky having Danny as a dad. Danny will be able to teach the child that it's important to be yourself and love yourself. With that type of support, Wilder will go far in life. Having accepting parents and family members makes such a huge difference. Kindness is one of the things that Danny promotes the most.
Danny is currently 36 weeks pregnant and in the home stretch. "Some moments I can't wait to get this baby out, while other moments I don't [want] this chapter to end," he said. "I've struggled with pretty severe Hyperemesis Gravidarum since week eight… I'm still vomiting about twice a day, am super fatigued and some days want to rip my heart out because the burn is so bad."
But all in all, the pregnancy gave Danny everything he needed when it came to acceptance. "As a recovering addict, this baby has taught me a level of self-care and love that I never even imagined possible," he said. "One that I've spent almost a decade searching for." The arrival of Wilder later this year is the positive news that 2020 needs. Without a doubt, Danny was made to be a dad.
