In last night's episode of ABC's hit reality TV show The Bachelor, called "The Women Tell All," the network did something pretty amazing. While in typical reality TV fashion, there were stories shared from the season, highly anticipated reunions between bachelor Peter Weber and all of the women he dated while on the show, and drama-filled confrontations, there was also an important message included in the two-hour special episode — the reality of harassment, including explicit online cruelty.
ABC made an extremely bold move. The network stood up for the women who appeared on the show this season by allowing the contestants to speak out about the online cruelty that has affected not just a few of the women, but every single person on the stage.
Rachel Lindsay was a runner-up on The Bachelor before becoming the first black Bachelorette. She is in an interracial relationship with her fiancé, Bryan Abasolo, whom she chose on her season. Rachel appeared onstage at the end of the show. She sat next to host Chris Harrison, and he gave her the floor. As Rachel started to speak, she admitted she was nervous. She had tears in her eyes as she started to address the issue of online cruelty that she, as well as the other contestants, had all experienced.
“By not talking about it, I think people feel empowered that they can continue to say certain things to us,” Rachel said. “If we’re ever going to fix this problem, we have to acknowledge the problem."
Given that Rachel was the first black woman to ever take the role of Bachelorette, it sounded like she knew she'd be in for a few unkind words from haters online. However, the reality star claimed that the kind of cruelty that has been directed at her over her appearance, her race, and everything in between has been downright horrifying. But Rachel didn't want to just talk about online harassment. She wanted viewers to really understand what she meant.
Rachel read a series of online comments that were directed at either herself or the contestants who were sitting on the stage. The comments were downright sickening. Rachel's hands shook as she read them to a room filled with shocked and disturbed audience members. The women sitting on the stage were also in tears. They were especially emotional when the comments that were likely directed at them were read aloud and the camera showed their reactions.
Sadly, most of the comments that Rachel read aloud were about the women's race, ethnicity, or appearance. The messages they received in the comments section of photographs on Facebook or Instagram, direct messages, and emails were graphic and disturbing. They were also often incredibly racist.
Chris Harrison allowed Rachel and the contestants from the most recent season to do most of the talking; however, he did chime in a few times to add that online bullying has gotten so much worse in recent years and that it simply has to be addressed. "This is hate," he said directly. It was clear that ABC felt it needed to do something to attempt to change the overwhelming number of incidents of its contestants being attacked online.
Some of the worst comments shared were ones like "kill yourself." Words like "ugly" and "idiot" were used. One comment called one woman the "ugliest girl" in the house. But the most common theme was the racism and the derogatory words, phrases, and cruelty directed at these beautiful women over the color of their skin.
Many past contestants weighed in online. They shared their own stories of online abuse or harassment, but according to reality TV show contestants, the epidemic of online attacks is getting more and more severe over the years. Many stars, especially the women, thanked these ladies for drawing attention to the issue.
One contestant, Sydney Hightower, who spoke out a lot of during the filming of the show about her background, has seen a lot of cruelty. She had her head in her hands when comments directed at her were read aloud. Sydney talked about having to be strong, saying “because if you don’t, you’re gonna fall apart.”
Another woman, Tammy, who was labeled this season's villain, sobbed as she revealed she had been receiving death threats in her email.
At the end of the show, Rachel thanked all of the women for allowing her to share some of the hateful comments they had received. “As someone who has been in your shoes, I know how much courage it takes to put yourself out there, to tell your story,” she said. “These people who hide behind their phones and their computers, they don’t have even a fraction of the guts that you have to stand up there today and face them.”
What's true about online hate is that it isn't just "criticism," which is what these ladies wanted to make known. It's not saying you didn't like someone's actions — that's part of going on a TV show like this. There will always be people who don't like you or aren't rooting for you. But dishing out racist comments or even death threats is another story entirely.
It's great to see that ABC is taking a stand and supporting its contestants by drawing attention to this issue in a way that is clear and direct. While huge networks and corporations often like to remain neutral in tough situations, ABC definitely realized it was time to speak out, and that's certainly admirable.
The problem with online harassment is that, so often, there are no consequences for what people say to one another. Trolls feel like they can get away with saying whatever horrible things they want while hiding behind their computers. Hopefully, these women speaking out will begin to turn the tide and make viewers understand that hate, whether out in public or from behind a screen, affects real people and is never OK.
