When two people are dating, they might come up with different ways to share expenses, whether those are fun expenses like date night or regular expenses like bills. As a couple gets more serious, these rules usually relax, and many married and long-term couples share everything completely.
That's not always the case, though. One man shared on Reddit that his wife didn't bring her purse or any money to their most recent date, and he was angry that he had to pay for her meal at all. As he tells it, this has been a habit the entire time he's known her — but lots of people aren't sure she's really the problem.
He says they go out every Friday night.
"I usually go out with my wife about every Friday night," the man explains. "When we were dating she very commonly forget to bring her purse or money at all so I would [pay] for her but I’ve been doing this for years and I have reached my absolute limit. I’ve been frustrated paying her her before but I never said anything as I didn’t her to think I was selfish."
More from LittleThings: Man Refuses To Pay For His Wife's Dinner After She Forgot To Bring Her Purse With Her
The family of three decided to go out to eat.
"About a week ago we decided to go eat at family restaurant with my wife and stepdaughter," the man continued. "In the car I asked her if she brought any money and she said that she didn’t so I told her go into the house before we leave and bring some cash. She went in and claimed she brought her purse with cash inside."
His wife said she had her purse, but she didn't.
"At the restaurant we receive our bill and what do you know my wife left her purse in the car. I told her to go bring and gave her the keys. She said it wasn’t in there. I went to check myself and it’s really not there. She’s looks embarrassed at our table and asks her own daughter to pay for her meal. My stepdaughter was going to do it but I told her to leave it as I would pay."
He accused his wife of doing this on purpose.
"I told my wife this was the last straw and that she was intentionally doing this. She denied my accusations and said to keep it down but the minute we got in the car she called me an asshole for just not paying. I responded with the fact that she 100% had the money to pay as she worked a good job and that this was ridiculous. She said I was still being a dick and I needed to think about I just said. I don’t think I did anything wrong."
People are definitely not on his side.
To be polite, people are completely baffled.
"If you had a problem with this thing she did frequently while you were dating, why did you marry her?" one commenter asked. "Why go for public embarrassment instead of just talking to her? Way to address this in the most passive-aggressive way possible.
"Honestly, why are you even counting pennies like this with your wife?"
And that it's weird he has never brought it up to her.
As a second person explained, the fact that he hasn't ever had a conversation with her about this is odd:
"Tbh it doesn't really seem like he has ever explicitly talked to her about this. He says he never bought it up as he didn't want to seem selfish, and then tells her randomly to bring cash and doesn't seem to explain why. Honestly if someone said to bring cash and we shared finances and thay always settled the bill, I would probably assume it was for something small like parking. Does anyone use cash anymore considering we have been in a pandemic the past two years? [The original poster (OP)] should learn to communicate before chucking a tanty."
But she shouldn't lie about not having her purse.
Some commenters did understand if his frustration is really about her lying. As a third commenter said, "She didn't try to explain that she likes it when he pays, or how it makes her feel she just lied and expected him to eat it. I don't think he has a problem with paying for the dinner, as he's been doing it from the beginning. The problem is that when he requested something she blatantly lied."
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