
Do you ever use the phrase "bring home the bacon?" If so, the lovely folks at PETA would like to have a word with you.
PETA just released a statement on Twitter about "anti-animal language," which it claims is comparable to "racist, homophobic, or ableist language." As it turns out, there are plenty of phrases in English that casually talk about violence against animals. "Beat a dead horse," for example. "Take the bull by the horns."
And apparently, PETA wants people to do away with those phrases.
The organization suggested a list of (hilarious) alternative phrases to use instead. So rather than "bringing home the bacon," we're supposed to now say "bringing home the bagels." Got it?
"Phrases that trivialize cruelty to animals will vanish as more people begin to appreciate animals for who they are," PETA wrote.
Sorry, but it's not gonna happen — or so says pretty much everyone on social media. People are mocking PETA with jokes, GIFs, and unapologetically anti-animal phrases.
"Obviously there is more than one way to skin a cat, so I think we can try new phrases," one user joked.

Most of us are familiar with PETA, the folks who champion the rights of animals and, occasionally, take things a bit too far.

Recently, PETA took to Twitter to advocate against "anti-animal language" — phrases that involve pigs, horses, and other animals.
"Words matter, and as our understanding of social justice evolves, our language evolves along with it," the tweet read.

"Here's how to remove speciesism from your daily conversations."
What followed was a list of anti-animal terms along with suggested alternatives. The list is… interesting, to say the least. It includes phrases like "kill two birds with one stone," which we should apparently replace with "feed two birds with one scone."

"Be the guinea pig" becomes "be the test tube" (?!?!).

"Beat a dead horse" becomes "feed a fed horse."
You get the idea.

Here's the entire list for your perusal.
Call me crazy, but I don't think any of these new phrases are actually going to catch on.

PETA explained more in a follow-up tweet, which rather outrageously compares anti-animal language to racist and homophobic slurs.

"Just as it became unacceptable to use racist, homophobic, or ableist language, phrases that trivialize cruelty to animals will vanish as more people begin to appreciate animals for who they are and start 'bringing home the bagels' instead of the bacon," the organization wrote.
And just to make it really clear that PETA is willing to die on this hill, the organization changed its Twitter name to "PETA: Bringing Home the Bagels Since 1980."

Not surprisingly, the replies are filled with people mocking the idea of "anti-animal language."

And some of them are quite clever.

It turns out there is no limit to these quasi-violent, animal-related figures of speech!

No animal is safe!

Seriously, though, there wasn't anyone on this thread who was able to take PETA's list to heart.

You might even call the whole endeavor a… wild goose chase.
Sorry.