Having a picky eater in the family can be tough for everyone. Many pediatricians will tell you that most children are picky eaters at some point — as Contemporary Pediatrics points out, being a picky eater is one way kids can assert some independence in a time in their life when they don't often have it.
But it is definitely possible for the whims and wants of a picky eater to cross over into territory that is no longer sustainable. One woman recently took to Reddit to explain why she's decided she's no longer catering to the meal preferences of her 7-year-old niece.
The woman kicks things off by explaining that she and her family have a tradition of having dinners together, and they take turns hosting.
"I have a niece who is 7," she begins. "Sometimes I have my family over for dinner and they all return the favor. The one stress about it is my niece. She is a very picky eater and my sister never wants to go through the motions of figuring out what she'll eat or trying to coax her to try something different."
She adds that her niece has a pretty specific set of meal requirements: "She expects us to make a separate meal for niece (mcdonald's style fries with garlic chicken tenders (that need to be home made) and a homemade sauce and tomato stuffed pasta). One time I just made it for everyone but the complaints were it wasn't great for a family meal."
Her sister requests that everyone just kind of put up with it.
"My sister, Leah, told me just make it for niece," the aunt explains. "I said I didn't want to make two separate meals. So while I make sure I always have some fries served, I won't go out of my way to make two meals. Leah is pissed and said I should be more accommodating. That wait until I have a picky kid and then I'll see."
The aunt decided to stop, and it turns out everyone else kind of agrees with her decision.
"I said she could bring food to my house for niece but I'm not going to slave over two separate meals. My parents think I'm being reasonable since they're tired of doing the same thing, so does my other sister Katie, because even when she tried to do just the pasta before it wasn't good enough."
Now the aunt is curious: Do other people think she should keep making her niece her own meals?
It turns out that they … do not.
Many people think that a 7-year-old making these demands is too much.
"Catering a completely separate meal for a fussy eater is ridiculous," wrote one commenter. "Having it be a 7 year old is even more ridiculous. You can tell your sister in advance what your making. If she doesn't think her kid will eat it, having her bring something for her is a completely reasonable ask."
Also, making separate meals might be doing more harm than good.
One commenter noted: "Unless the kid has sensory issues, it's also contrary to what pediatricians tell you to do. My kid is a picky 2 year old and my pediatrician specifically told us not to offer alternatives and just feed him normal dinner. Pediatricians see a lot of kids who have digestive problems from just eating chicken nuggets and fries. Not a whole lot of fiber there."
Other parents of picky eaters also weighed in, and they still agree with the aunt.
"I have a 7yo and a 5yo that are the same way, but the rule is eat it or politely decline," wrote a commenter. "There will be no more food until breakfast the choice is up to them. They can usually find a little something that they like. If you can convince the kid to try something new, add a bit of sugar and salt to their plate especially if you're using bitter or acidic foods. Kids are usually more sensitive to those flavors and sugar and salt will mask them. Then when she likes it, she'll be more willing to continue to try new foods."
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