Here’s How Moms Are Coping Headed Into Year 3 Of The Pandemic

I navigated year one of the pandemic by keeping my mind busy and focusing on goals. In between wiping down groceries and panicking every time we passed a stranger on the sidewalk when we ventured for fresh air, I was set to publish a children’s book I wrote about my daughter, called Princess Genevieve: The Hero With Girl Power. I made plans to support the launch, focused on my job and virtual school, spent time enjoying my children, and decided that since we'd already started packing up boxes, we weren’t going to let this pandemic stop our plans of selling our house. For the most part — and ironically — I actually felt a decrease in my anxiety because I wasn’t worried about my daughter’s safety at school (hello, lockdown drills) or my husband taking business trips on a plane. Our family was together. Even if I had to Lysol the house every time a real estate agent came.

By year two of the pandemic, we'd settled into our new home and town, and the world started to open up. While being social in outside settings was fun — and we got to even host some outside parties with my husband’s wood-fired pizza oven — my anxiety crept back. My husband started to travel again, and I feared he would carry the virus home. Selecting the option of virtual first grade kept my daughter safe but brought on a load of stress for both of us as we navigated my work and her first grade in the same office — and there were many meltdowns on both ends during math class. To keep the kids occupied during winter quarantine, we got a puppy (our third dog), which made for a fun distraction. Summer in our lake community made life seem almost back to normal as the neighborhood kids swam and I connected with moms on the beach.

And just when it seemed like we'd made progress, we find ourselves in the mess of 2022. I pulled my son out of preschool a week before he was slated to start. We’re homeschooling, and I hope by spring or summer, I can enroll him in a school setting. I’m worried that he’s going to fall behind on socialization and go into kindergarten crying in the corner for eight hours. But I work from home and can teach him, so I felt like I could not take the risk sending him right now.

My daughter is in second grade, and her schedule changes from full-time in-person to virtual and half-days as needed. I cried during virtual back-to-school night watching a really adorable video her teacher made of the kids in class (seated apart and with masks on) and eating lunch outside on beach towels. I am so happy she is in-person, where she wants to be, but at the same time, I’m sad that this is a “normal” school experience for young kids.

We stress about exposures, even though we all wear masks. Every day, I ask her who was absent and who she sat next to, so I can contact-trace. I had a panic attack when vaccines became available for kids. The pressure to make the “right” decision for her health consumed me with worry.

We’re still pretty much in lockdown mode at our house and do not see extended family during holidays. No playdates indoors with friends or family, even if they are vaccinated. We Zoom, and I even sent my brother’s kids the same charades game our kids have so we can play virtually.

And in the middle of omicron spreading like wildfire, my husband has a business trip. I’m fine. Everything’s fine!

Really. I am just starting year three of the pandemic trusting the universe, simplifying life, and focusing on what I can control. On my 2022 vision board, I cut and pasted the words “live more, stress less” and “keep life simple.” That’s all we can do. Enjoy the present, live in gratitude, and focus on what we have. Will I still freak out? Absolutely! But I am going to try to maintain this mindset and focus on my passions instead of scrolling social media and reading upsetting stories.

I spoke with other moms to see how they are coping year three into the pandemic, and here is what they told me.

Heather Odendaal, founder of WNORTH and Bluebird Strategy, tells LittleThings, “Much of the current narrative around working mothers during the pandemic has been wrapped up in the ‘great resignation,’ their mental health, the emotional labor they bear, and the external pulls that have caused women to remove themselves (or be pushed out) of the workforce. As the fifth wave rolls on, we are all battling with the question, 'How long can I live in crisis mode and how will this affect my relationship with my children?'”

As a small business owner and mother of two children under the age of 7, Odendaal shares that she is coping by planning family experiences every Sunday. She also orders meal delivery or meal kits and isn’t afraid to ask her parents to chip in when she needs additional financial support. The family also pretends they are going on a tropical beach holiday when they head to the local indoor public pool (when allowed), complete with packing the sunscreen (but not putting it on) and making mocktails when they get home.

Sara Alter, founder of Moment Consulting, says, “The main themes I hear from women, and the issues I struggle with myself, all revolve around pandemic fear, unrealistic expectations, guilt, and fatigue. Outside of COVID, I think so much of it comes down to technology and our unique access to absorb, connect, and compare at any given moment. Three years into this pandemic, I think we are too accessible to the things we need space from and too detached from the people and support we crave.”

She tells LittleThings that moms should surround themselves with supportive, like-minded people who will nourish and preserve their mental health; be mindful of what foods, social media, and shows they consume; and stop comparing their real life to someone else’s highlight reel. Instead, “be more intentional about what fills you up outside of motherhood.”

Achea Redd — mental health activist and author of the books Be Free, Be You</em>; Authentic You</em>; and the forthcoming The Precipice of Mental Health — tells LittleThings, “Life with COVID, no matter the variant, is tough. It seems that it will never end, but then I remind myself that ultimately it will because it has to. The only consistent thing in life is change. The tide will turn eventually, and though we can hardly wait until that happens, I still encourage untamed and fierce gratitude. Over the last few years, gratitude has really become a buzzword. There are journals, mindfulness apps, pretty much something for everyone. I say, if you have a system that’s working, continue it, but one thing I plan to do this year is write down one good thing that has happened in the week and place it in a glass jar. This will serve two purposes: (1) help you focus on the positive around you and in your life, and (2) at the end of the year you will have at least 52 reminders that life, even in its challenges, has been pretty good.”