Weddings are difficult to plan and sometimes bring out the worst in people. There’s a reason the term “bridezilla” was created. One such bride took to Reddit to get support for her decision to exclude her autistic adult cousin from her wedding because it was going to be child-free. She thought this was sound logic.
Reddit users were happy to put her in her place. It is never OK to exclude someone based on their disability. One can only hope this is a teachable moment for this ableist bride.
The bride and groom wanted a child-free wedding.
The bride’s story started out sounding rational. “Next spring, I am getting married to the love of my life,” she began. “We have decided that we don’t want children at our wedding. Not many of our friends and family have young children, and the ones that do are fine with getting a sitter for the weekend since we gave them a lot of notice.”
The bride believed her 'child-free' policy extended to her adult cousin who is on the autism spectrum.
The bride’s policy quickly becomes problematic. “The only ones to put up a fight are my aunt and uncle who have a daughter with autism,” she continued. “She is 20, but will be 21 by the time my wedding day comes around. She is what they call 'high-functioning', which means she can talk and wash/dress herself, and she has some friends. She graduated from high school a couple years ago and is currently living with her parents (my aunt and uncle) while working at a grocery store.”
More from LittleThings: 'The Costco Bride' Reveals How She Creatively Used Store To Save Big On Her Wedding Day
The entitled bride doubles down.
The bride just got worse from there. “Despite her being technically an adult I just don’t see her as such,” she stated. “Every time I talk to her at a family gathering it’s like talking to a child. She is obsessed with toy ponies and barbie dolls, and brings them up at every opportunity. She draws in her notebook constantly and never makes eye contact when talking to me. She does not have loud meltdowns like other special needs kids I’ve met before, but I really don’t want to risk her ruining my special day.”
Her aunt and uncle tried to reason with her.
This bride just does not seem to get it even though many in her life have tried to explain her wrongdoings to her. “I told my aunt and uncle that I didn’t want her there and they became very upset. They said she already saw the invite and knew it was child-free but because she is an 'adult', she thought she was still included. My aunt tried to guilt me by saying she’d already picked out a dress and a gift but I didn’t want to hear it. My fiancé says I’m being an [expletive] and we should let her attend because she has attended other weddings before with no issue. Everyone is making me feel horrible for not treating her like an adult when she doesn’t act like one.”
The bride is in the wrong here.
If this bride was looking for sympathy or backup, Reddit surely did not supply it for her. It was unanimous on the site that she was wrong and acting entitled and ableist.
“Get over yourself,” wrote one user. “Your cousin literally is an adult who like you said doesn’t actually cause disruptions or has sensory issues that makes sitting through events like weddings hard. You have no reason to not invite her other than you not liking her. Idk frankly it sounds like you’re the difficult one in the family.”
She seems to care more about looks than people.
Users on the site were quick to point out that her child-free policy does not cover her adult cousin.
“Having a child-free wedding has nothing to do with your cousin because she is NOT a child,” wrote one user. “What you want is a wedding where no one has any type of disability or cognitive disorder. You are the ah for: 1) your ableist attitude; 2) prioritizing some image that you have of 'your day' over peoples' feelings; and 3) not giving an [expletive] about what your fiancé thinks.”
The heart of the issue.
Another user sums up the OP’s opinions in question form.
“What exactly makes you think she would 'ruin your special day'? Simply the fact that she is autistic?!!” the person pointedly asked.
Let's hope the bride learns from this feedback.
This bride has not made any fans on this site. She is very much in the wrong here and one can only hope she is open to hearing this. Perhaps she can learn something.
These stories are based on posts found on Reddit. Reddit is a user-generated social news aggregation, web content rating, and discussion website where registered members submit content to the site and can up- or down-vote the content. The accuracy and authenticity of each story cannot be confirmed by our staff.
