Mom life is rewarding, but it can be tricky. While you knew that it wasn’t going to be easy, there are likely #momstacles — obstacles for moms — that you didn’t expect.
People talk about the sleepless nights, tantrums, endless loads of laundry, and the sheer exhaustion, but did they prepare you for the mom guilt?
Or how difficult it would be to juggle every aspect of your life at once? Or how you might feel downright lonely at times?
Parenthood is an adjustment filled with ups, downs, and uncertainty. Consider raising children as the biggest learning curve you will experience in your lifetime, and one of the greatest lessons in your journey is that you don’t need to do it alone!
That’s where your mom squad comes in, that group of parents — or even just one other parent — who are in the throes of parenthood as well and fully relate to the fact that you didn’t respond to their text because you were busy helping your 2-year-old navigate his big emotions. Having that squad alongside you makes the journey that much sweeter. Note that #MomSquads do not have to be made up of women only but can include any other parent you relate to.
Here are five reasons why you must develop and maintain a mom squad of your own.
You don’t have to mom it alone.
All of us have questioned our parenting choices at the end of the day. We’ve all been stuck in a mom-guilt rut, and some days you may feel alone in the struggle. But that doesn’t mean you are. Everyone moves through negative emotions at some point throughout motherhood, and there is absolutely someone else who knows exactly what you’re feeling.
A strong network of moms who have your back and resonate with the roller coaster called motherhood makes the guilt and the difficult decision making more manageable.
You can have mom vent sessions.
Ever try to vent about your day as a mom to your partner or non-mom friend? While some of it may be received and understood, this is not an all-the-time occurrence. At times, you may even leave the conversation feeling more stressed than you already were.
Wouldn’t it be a huge relief to end a vent session feeling validated and seen? Having a heart-to-heart with your mom squad or mom bestie can do just this. More likely than not, they’ve been there and can empathize with your frustration, sadness, guilt, or exhaustion.
You have your own village.
This is a cliché in the parenting world, but the saying “it takes a village” is timeless because of its truth. In this day and age, putting trust in others to watch your children can be difficult, but having a close-knit group of mom friends can give you surefire peace of mind that your kids will be in good hands.
Need a mom break to keep you calm and collected? Call up your friend and ask if you can drop your kids off to make a quick coffee run and get five minutes of quiet. Likely, they’ll completely understand and will be happy to do it for you. Just remember to return the favor!
Since extended family isn’t always available, or even an option for some, having a squad who knows and loves your child like their own can make date nights easier to plan or emergencies easier to navigate.
You can be yourself.
While you’ll do it for your child, going on playdates can be awkward if you don’t know the parent. You might not have the same views, beliefs, or interests, leading to small talk or, even worse, the dreaded silence.
Having playdates within your mom community allows you to be yourself and roll with real-life situations with less stress. If your child decides to throw a tantrum, you don’t need to feel pressured to pick up and leave. You can manage the behavior without fear of judgment in front of others who can relate or who may even chip in to help!
You can have uninterrupted 'mom time.'
Hanging out within your motherhood community means the kids get to play together while you get to have adult conversations and enjoy time with your friends. You can talk about the most recent season of your favorite adult Netflix show or catch up on the latest news without the worry of little ears listening. They’ll be too busy having a good time to interrupt your conversation for the umpteenth time that day.
Adult connections are essential to mental health. You’ll get to leave feeling refreshed and ready to take on the rest of the day as a mom!
Bonus: Your kids grow up together.
Lifelong mom friendships come with a special bonus for their kids. Mom squad kids get built-in friends, often from birth or toddlerhood, whom they will grow up with. This experience can lead to an unbreakable bond for both the moms and kids.